My eldest's incredulous look when I suggested we do research at the library truly was priceless. We've been watching a really interesting series on mammals. Except for the "REALLY GROSS" bit on birth (I love preteens!), Jane's absorbed the information like a sponge.
Since it's something that interest her, I suggested we find some books to read and she write a few pages on a mammal. She was dismayed at that idea. :-) I want her to enjoy learning and in turn learn about what interests her, at the same time she needs to read and write, daily. I figured this loosely defined "paper" would give us a chance to explore what our goals are together as we home school.
I say us, because I see our relationship as symbiont, neither one of us succeeding in our goals (Jane's education) without coexisting together.
So my vague ideas and my mother's willingness to take Ean on his "off" day of Kindergarten left us alone to tackle the library where we dutifully typed in mammals. We quickly found over a thousand entries on a good 100 web pages. Words of previous English instructors lecturing on the importance of narrowing a topic echoed briefly in my head while Jane and I scanned the list. Luckily the word "Coyote" jumped out at Jane and we were spared any more "research". We quickly found a few books that were perfect, not to long or scientific, just basic facts in an easy to read "YOUTH" type format.
One book was kind enough to bold important words, which I had Jane write down the meanings when she read the first chapter later that morning. It seemed like an awful school-ish sort of thing to do, but keeping in mind that Jane doesn't always comprehend or retain what she reads, it seemed like a good chance for her to stop and think about the meaning of the words, and text of the book.
We'll talk more about what she read on Monday. I plan on showing her an outline, both in reference to note taking (she could use all the help she can get with organizing her thoughts) and in paper writing.
Hopefully her math curriculum comes soon. We're covering a smattering of topics across the board but I'm not math minded so I don't naturally turn to math examples while teaching her. I'm more of a thought, idea person, so that's how our conversations are geared. It works great for Social studies, English, literature and even science (we had a great conversation on why Pluto is no longer a planet Friday) but eh, not so much for math.
We did stop by a local store with educational resources and picked up some great references to help guide us through some of our topics. It is a bit daunting to see a whole world of opportunity out there to study and knowing we can only brush the surface of a fraction of it. That is why my ulitmate goal is to teach my girl HOW to learn, so she can have the tools to find answers to whatever questions she's searching for.
This will be an interesting journey, of that I have no doubt.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Snow!!! So how's a family to spend a Saturday?
Well we went swimming of course! *laugh*
Since Jane's quit taekwondo (we've let her know that if she chooses to take it up again, we support that decision), my gym membership is ticking away like a time bomb. See I was required to have the gym membership for Jane to go to this particular school. When Jane turned ten, she in turn was required to have membership in connection with my membership. On top of these expenses there's a monthly fee of $25.00.
It sure sounds expensive typed out, but when the monthly cost is figured out, it was still cheaper then most martial art academies in the valley. Throw in the incredible quality of her teachers and it was worth every penny. She gained so much from Taekwondo. Truly it's amazing.
However her instructors are opening a school not associated with the gym, and I frankly am greatly dissatisfied with my membership. I've had a membership for almost eight years, I always pay in advance for a year (early on I did six months at a time), I'm the sort of person they should be catering too.
Uh no.
The owner is abrasive and difficult to talk too. They raised fees when two new gyms opened. They will try to cut deals with new memberships while keeping old members paying excessive fees.
Yeah, I'm done.
But my paid membership is good until May first. Hot dog, we need to use the pool more! Kent was able to get a promotion, a two week membership free, so today and next Saturday, we take advantage of the pool.
It's no easy feat with the twins and Ean, none of which can swim but my mom met us there and we were able to get some good practice in for the boys. I'm not the best instructor, I don't put my face in the water and I'm not an accomplished swimmer, but I can get by. The boys didn't seem to care and the twins can kick with great relish! Ean was more stubborn, just sure I was trying to drown him when I suggested he kick to my mother.
We went at three, came home by 4:30 and (hysterically) Greg was asleep by 5:00. Everyone else quickly crashed after dinner, so it's been a really peaceful evening.
Of course Kent and I are to tired to do anything. :-)
Since Jane's quit taekwondo (we've let her know that if she chooses to take it up again, we support that decision), my gym membership is ticking away like a time bomb. See I was required to have the gym membership for Jane to go to this particular school. When Jane turned ten, she in turn was required to have membership in connection with my membership. On top of these expenses there's a monthly fee of $25.00.
It sure sounds expensive typed out, but when the monthly cost is figured out, it was still cheaper then most martial art academies in the valley. Throw in the incredible quality of her teachers and it was worth every penny. She gained so much from Taekwondo. Truly it's amazing.
However her instructors are opening a school not associated with the gym, and I frankly am greatly dissatisfied with my membership. I've had a membership for almost eight years, I always pay in advance for a year (early on I did six months at a time), I'm the sort of person they should be catering too.
Uh no.
The owner is abrasive and difficult to talk too. They raised fees when two new gyms opened. They will try to cut deals with new memberships while keeping old members paying excessive fees.
Yeah, I'm done.
But my paid membership is good until May first. Hot dog, we need to use the pool more! Kent was able to get a promotion, a two week membership free, so today and next Saturday, we take advantage of the pool.
It's no easy feat with the twins and Ean, none of which can swim but my mom met us there and we were able to get some good practice in for the boys. I'm not the best instructor, I don't put my face in the water and I'm not an accomplished swimmer, but I can get by. The boys didn't seem to care and the twins can kick with great relish! Ean was more stubborn, just sure I was trying to drown him when I suggested he kick to my mother.
We went at three, came home by 4:30 and (hysterically) Greg was asleep by 5:00. Everyone else quickly crashed after dinner, so it's been a really peaceful evening.
Of course Kent and I are to tired to do anything. :-)
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I felt so good about today!
Jane and I put the twins on the bus. Ean and Kate were at school and it was just the eleven year old and myself. A chance to really talk. What a rarity in our house! Jane's at the age where she doesn't always reveal herself either. We're in the rocky ground of respecting her sense of self and privacy while still wanting to maintain that communication and dialog that is so vital for teens.
I called my mom and invited her on a walk, so Jane and I went over and picked her up. We walked a good forty minutes and while walking discussed what makes a good writer. We talked about shaping your writing (Jane wants to be an author), reworking your words, shaping your ideas.
Jane then told us about a book she read and she mentioned a girl that was a slave because she was poor. This led to a fascinating discussion on how being poor can make someone a slave. We discussed what real poverty is and how cruel slavery is. After our walk Jane and I watched a PBS show on slavery and how slavery started in the U.S. It was very interesting.
I volunteered at head start and Jane worked on a letter for her pen pal followed by some math games on the computer. It was a very fulfilling day.
Jane said she enjoyed discussing things without someone behind her flicking rubber bands on her head. So there you go. Day two.
I called my mom and invited her on a walk, so Jane and I went over and picked her up. We walked a good forty minutes and while walking discussed what makes a good writer. We talked about shaping your writing (Jane wants to be an author), reworking your words, shaping your ideas.
Jane then told us about a book she read and she mentioned a girl that was a slave because she was poor. This led to a fascinating discussion on how being poor can make someone a slave. We discussed what real poverty is and how cruel slavery is. After our walk Jane and I watched a PBS show on slavery and how slavery started in the U.S. It was very interesting.
I volunteered at head start and Jane worked on a letter for her pen pal followed by some math games on the computer. It was a very fulfilling day.
Jane said she enjoyed discussing things without someone behind her flicking rubber bands on her head. So there you go. Day two.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Our first day of school
Really today wasn't the best of days for it to be our "first day." I don't have Jane's math curriculum yet. Ean was home from kindergarten and his special brand of chaos makes any day challenging and I had to leave first thing to go to the twins parent teacher conferences.
However recognizing that we won't be perfect and it will take a few months to "get into the groove" I chose the "no stress" option and just let the day be what it was.
Jane had read a chapter out of a new book yesterday. I had talked to her Sunday night about what a summary is and the differences between a summary and a story of her own creation. She needed to write a paragraph summarizing what she read in that chapter.
See Jane's had comprehension problems, the skill of recalling important information from a text is a struggle for her, so I want to work with her on recalling and summarizing and understanding what she reads. I figure the skills she needs can be developed in whatever context, fiction or non-fiction so we'll just work on summarizing everything. Hopefully it will get easier to recognize information that's important and easier to retain and recall that information. She did really well on that paragraph.
We then proof read her work together. I've introduced her to dictionary.com and have a dictionary here at the house she can use. She misspells very basic words, so that's another skill we'll be working heavily on.
We then went to the Library. Ean was with my mom, so it was the two little boys and Jane. Jane had the hardest time picking out what she wanted to read. I hope to go regularly so hopefully she feels more comfortable just taking a chance recognizing that if she doesn't like it, there's always more books to get. Greg however had no problem picking out books. He came running to me regularly with a handful of more books he wanted to take home.
I do believe he has no clue what the Library actually is and that we will have issues when the time comes to return the books.
Jane picked out a series on mammals that we will watch together and I picked out a series on the history of America that focused on slavery. Jane announced that one didn't look like fun, but it's a very important subject that she needs to know and understand. She can't understand why it was wrong if she doesn't realize that slavery happened.
I think I'll go the thrift store this week and see if I can find some textbooks that fit Jane's age/grade so we can have reading material in the house as well. We can get so much off the Internet but it's just not the same as leafing through a book.
Jane's biggest home school question to date was "Do I have to wear shoes when we have school?" *laugh* Ean's big question was when does HE get to have school at home. I had to break it to him, that the answer is not anytime soon. He's to busy and doesn't listen at home. I can't teach him. Not now anyway. Kate's concern was over Jane getting a school tubby with paper and stuff in it. We let her know that she has all that stuff in her desk.
So everyone will adjust.
I should mention that parent teacher conferences this AM went fine. Surprise surprise my boys are adored by their teachers. But who doesn't adore my children? :)
However recognizing that we won't be perfect and it will take a few months to "get into the groove" I chose the "no stress" option and just let the day be what it was.
Jane had read a chapter out of a new book yesterday. I had talked to her Sunday night about what a summary is and the differences between a summary and a story of her own creation. She needed to write a paragraph summarizing what she read in that chapter.
See Jane's had comprehension problems, the skill of recalling important information from a text is a struggle for her, so I want to work with her on recalling and summarizing and understanding what she reads. I figure the skills she needs can be developed in whatever context, fiction or non-fiction so we'll just work on summarizing everything. Hopefully it will get easier to recognize information that's important and easier to retain and recall that information. She did really well on that paragraph.
We then proof read her work together. I've introduced her to dictionary.com and have a dictionary here at the house she can use. She misspells very basic words, so that's another skill we'll be working heavily on.
We then went to the Library. Ean was with my mom, so it was the two little boys and Jane. Jane had the hardest time picking out what she wanted to read. I hope to go regularly so hopefully she feels more comfortable just taking a chance recognizing that if she doesn't like it, there's always more books to get. Greg however had no problem picking out books. He came running to me regularly with a handful of more books he wanted to take home.
I do believe he has no clue what the Library actually is and that we will have issues when the time comes to return the books.
Jane picked out a series on mammals that we will watch together and I picked out a series on the history of America that focused on slavery. Jane announced that one didn't look like fun, but it's a very important subject that she needs to know and understand. She can't understand why it was wrong if she doesn't realize that slavery happened.
I think I'll go the thrift store this week and see if I can find some textbooks that fit Jane's age/grade so we can have reading material in the house as well. We can get so much off the Internet but it's just not the same as leafing through a book.
Jane's biggest home school question to date was "Do I have to wear shoes when we have school?" *laugh* Ean's big question was when does HE get to have school at home. I had to break it to him, that the answer is not anytime soon. He's to busy and doesn't listen at home. I can't teach him. Not now anyway. Kate's concern was over Jane getting a school tubby with paper and stuff in it. We let her know that she has all that stuff in her desk.
So everyone will adjust.
I should mention that parent teacher conferences this AM went fine. Surprise surprise my boys are adored by their teachers. But who doesn't adore my children? :)
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Some lighthearted updates.
First the big news. At school on Friday, TWICE, yes TWICE my son Greg announced "I gwo potty" and went and did his business. Oh my, how exciting is THAT?! *laugh* Not only that but my silent guy who has spent so much time in his own world announced to his teacher at lunch "I open my chocolate milk miss Pam"
How wonderful those words are!! Simply wonderful!!!
David is also using the potty at school. Neither one is using the potty for bowel movements but they're definitely making progress and I'll take what I can get!!
It's been a crazy week but apparently it's my job to provide light hearted laughter for my boys teachers. Karen (teaching assistant in Greg's class) noticed that Greg was walking funny so she went over to him to check and see if his shoes were on the wrong feet. Left foot..... left, right foot uh.... left? Wait the child had two left feet. She had to go check David (in the class next door). Oh yeah baby, David had two right feet.
Everyone had a good chuckle.
Other humorous stories, a friend volunteered in Kate's classroom. This friends daughter is in the same room as Kate and well, she's a sucker. Kate could W O R K her.
Apparently everyone needed to get their paints and Kate went to get an extra one, another child had taken the extra that was in plain sight. Kate turned on the water works and this friend totally called her honey, totally felt horrible Kate was so upset.
I told her she should have told Kate to get a grip.
Kate's teacher knows Kate and in total non-nonsense voice asked Kate the problem and told her where to go get the paints. See, the teacher "gets" Kate.
I let my friend know that she wasn't allowed to have Kate over at her house until she learned a few key phrases with Kate. Telling Kate "you're fine, go play" is perfectly acceptable!
Ahhhh, this week needed a little humor!
How wonderful those words are!! Simply wonderful!!!
David is also using the potty at school. Neither one is using the potty for bowel movements but they're definitely making progress and I'll take what I can get!!
It's been a crazy week but apparently it's my job to provide light hearted laughter for my boys teachers. Karen (teaching assistant in Greg's class) noticed that Greg was walking funny so she went over to him to check and see if his shoes were on the wrong feet. Left foot..... left, right foot uh.... left? Wait the child had two left feet. She had to go check David (in the class next door). Oh yeah baby, David had two right feet.
Everyone had a good chuckle.
Other humorous stories, a friend volunteered in Kate's classroom. This friends daughter is in the same room as Kate and well, she's a sucker. Kate could W O R K her.
Apparently everyone needed to get their paints and Kate went to get an extra one, another child had taken the extra that was in plain sight. Kate turned on the water works and this friend totally called her honey, totally felt horrible Kate was so upset.
I told her she should have told Kate to get a grip.
Kate's teacher knows Kate and in total non-nonsense voice asked Kate the problem and told her where to go get the paints. See, the teacher "gets" Kate.
I let my friend know that she wasn't allowed to have Kate over at her house until she learned a few key phrases with Kate. Telling Kate "you're fine, go play" is perfectly acceptable!
Ahhhh, this week needed a little humor!
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Jane and the decision to homeschool, the good, the bad and the ugly.
Friday was her last day of public school. She's already second guessing her decision but she knows we're doing this for the rest of the school year and if she doesn't like it, she can go back to middle school for seventh grade.
It's really a pity, up until this year public school was a good match for Jane. Actually it's interesting how we were led to public school. Jane struggled so much as a small child, just not comprehending language, vocabulary, grammar, basic sentence structure was completely absent from her speech. It was frustrating for both her and us. She obviously needed help but I held off until four determined to do everything I could for her.
It's interesting because I'm no dummy with language and no stranger to speech and language delays but something about Jane's processing made it impossible for me to reach her. I just didn't know how. So feeling like a failure I went to our Local early learning (schooling for special ed between 3 and kindergarten). Actually I tried getting her into head start but our income was way to high, luckily the individuals I talked to recognized that even though I didn't know the system and didn't realize that help was available for Jane, she needed help. So after testing she was admitted to school.
It was a good year for Jane and she learned a lot but was still short of what was needed for Kindergarten. We plowed forward anyway and were lucky enough to meet Susan M. the speech teacher, a woman fiercely devoted to her kids. She latched onto Jane and spoke on her behalf, getting her every ounce of services we could muster from the school district. Susan along with a smattering of teachers did everything they could to reach Jane's needs.
Hindsight is a funny thing. I can see why Jane needed public school, even more I can see why *we* needed Jane in public school. See, when Jane was in the system and getting so much help, I got pregnant. We didn't realize it but that pregnancy would change our lives and I simply would not have been able to home school at that time. Between doctors visits and bed rest topped by a whole lot of worry, yeah, I had no time for schooling kiddos. My children were fed and clothed and everything else was survival mode.
I don't think we attended a single parent teacher conference that year. :)
Jane's support continued even after she tested out of her IEP at the end of forth grade. See the local elementary had no problem setting an iplan into place. In Idaho if child that doesn't qualify for resource room is recognized as needing extra help, an iplan is put into place. It's not legally binding like an IEP but the school sets forth on what they're going to do to help the child, reading like an IEP. Basically it sets kids like Jane up for success. I think it's wonderful to catch those borderline kids and was thrilled that for fifth and sixth Jane's elementary was going to do everything possible to get Jane ready for middle school.
It was a great plan and for fifth grade worked fantastic until the school district got this fantastic idea to move sixth graders to middle school.
We lost sixth grade, half the time we had counted on, I had counted on, to prepare her for middle school. Jane freaked out at moving up and I worked hard to reassure her that we'd make it work.
Fifth grade ended and summer was okay. Jane was nervous, well we all were nervous but Jane had a couple of good friends she could lean on and I knew that would help. I remember how my good friends pulled me through those difficult times making it possible to keep going forward. Finally the first day of school arrived and Jane walked with her two friends. They continued to walk again through most of September.
Things were a bit more frustrating with what was happening inside the school.
The very first frustration was after being reassured that sixth graders would be kept at a sixth grade elementary format, the middle school put them on a rotating schedule going to different classes just like the seventh and eighth graders.
That was the beginning, then there was Jane's iplan. Even though the elementary had sent the iplan to the school and Jane tested extremely low in language comprehension (which HELLO, makes everything harder!), basically for eight weeks, the school said "we don't know what to do to help her." She was frustrated, we were frustrated. Finally I made some important connections getting her some help. To start with I contacted her math teacher, who was completely puzzled that Jane had never been exposed to long division. I explained that Jane was a resource room kid that had not yet reached grade level.
Light bulb moment for her teacher.
I explained that we had counted on the sixth grade to get her to level for seventh grade. *sigh* And we lost that chance when the school district kicked those kids to middle school. This teacher offered to help Jane after school two to three times a week and I encouraged Jane to see her. Within just a few weeks Jane's math improved tremendously.
Here was a child that had math explained in a room with five other students, thrust into a room with 30 students with language comprehension problems being told to perform at a level she hasn't even reached yet! And this was just math.
The school had an after school night the end of September (school had started mid-august) and Kent and I made sure to speak to every one of her teachers and we got some directions to move her forward and get her the help she needed. We felt good, most of her teachers recognized that she was struggling and wanted to help her. Her main teacher also was working to get her back into resource room.
This was a step in the right direction, then a week after this school night where we had talked with all of Jane's teacher we found out the middle school hadn't confirmed the states requirements for sixth graders. The state requires over a hundred minutes a day back to back, without interruption for the language arts. Since the middle school didn't follow through on the elementary school format and had them switching periods, they were not fulfilling the states requirements. So seven weeks into school after we had talked with and worked with Jane's teachers, Jane got a new schedule with all new teachers.
*frustration level rising*
And if this wasn't hard enough for Jane, her two friends, one of which she'd been best friends with since first grade dumped her. Said they didn't want to be friends with her anymore. Started crossing the street while walking home to get away from her. I haven't confirmed but I believe they decided to go with more popular "cool" people and Jane just didn't fit the bill. It was a crappy thing to do to Jane and school turned even more lonely.
Now I don't believe Jane was bullied or picked on more then anyone else, but she's sensitive, she internalizes making any teasing that much more painful.
When school started, I had expressed a desire to home school but acknowledged that with my schedule, it just wouldn't be possible for sixth grade. I have to give volunteer time at head start. The twins are also home on Mondays. Ean has a nightmarish rotating day schedule, going to school Tuesdays and Thursdays and every other Monday. The boys make an environment that is not conducive to serious learning. Trying to help Jane with homework with boys jumping all over us has worn my nerves to a frazzle as is. However I had a brainstorm.
My mom bought a house within walking distance. I talked with mom and she's agreed to help. Of course I would be Jane's primary teacher but my mom's house would be a perfect study hall. A quiet place to do school work without all the distractions our home has. I think Fridays will become Ean's special day with Mormor. That will give us one more day during the week with Ean free time, where we could focus one on one.
I talked with Jane. She completely balked at the idea. It was crazy talk. Not go to school?
We entered a balancing act of me trying to push Jane to understand what home schooling really involved and Kent stressing that it was HER choice and that it wouldn't happen unless Jane said so. I confess that stressing it was Jane's choice worried me because I didn't want her to continue on being miserable until she was beaten down and her esteem was in the toilet. I know it had to be her choice, but I worried that she'd hang in there until she just couldn't stand it anymore.
After talking to her dad about what it's like to be home schooled, she asked me if she could stay home one day and see what it was like. I let her know that one day wouldn't give a fair picture and she needed at least until the end of the year to really decide if she liked it or not. When I let her know that if she didn't like homeschooling, we'd register her for seventh grade at the middle school in the fall, She made her decision on Wednesday before school.
She asked if she could just stay home. :) I told her she needed to finish out the week. Get all the telephone numbers of her friends, people she wanted to stay in contact with and she needed to clean out her locker, return books ect.
Friday morning right after sending her off, I called the school and let them know.
Jane is already second guessing herself. The unfamiliar is always scary. I think she'll settle down quickly as we establish a routine. She was also disappointed when I took her booty from her locker and sorted out "all the good stuff" to put in the newly dubbed "school tubby".
So I am Jane's teacher. For everything. Wish us luck.
It's really a pity, up until this year public school was a good match for Jane. Actually it's interesting how we were led to public school. Jane struggled so much as a small child, just not comprehending language, vocabulary, grammar, basic sentence structure was completely absent from her speech. It was frustrating for both her and us. She obviously needed help but I held off until four determined to do everything I could for her.
It's interesting because I'm no dummy with language and no stranger to speech and language delays but something about Jane's processing made it impossible for me to reach her. I just didn't know how. So feeling like a failure I went to our Local early learning (schooling for special ed between 3 and kindergarten). Actually I tried getting her into head start but our income was way to high, luckily the individuals I talked to recognized that even though I didn't know the system and didn't realize that help was available for Jane, she needed help. So after testing she was admitted to school.
It was a good year for Jane and she learned a lot but was still short of what was needed for Kindergarten. We plowed forward anyway and were lucky enough to meet Susan M. the speech teacher, a woman fiercely devoted to her kids. She latched onto Jane and spoke on her behalf, getting her every ounce of services we could muster from the school district. Susan along with a smattering of teachers did everything they could to reach Jane's needs.
Hindsight is a funny thing. I can see why Jane needed public school, even more I can see why *we* needed Jane in public school. See, when Jane was in the system and getting so much help, I got pregnant. We didn't realize it but that pregnancy would change our lives and I simply would not have been able to home school at that time. Between doctors visits and bed rest topped by a whole lot of worry, yeah, I had no time for schooling kiddos. My children were fed and clothed and everything else was survival mode.
I don't think we attended a single parent teacher conference that year. :)
Jane's support continued even after she tested out of her IEP at the end of forth grade. See the local elementary had no problem setting an iplan into place. In Idaho if child that doesn't qualify for resource room is recognized as needing extra help, an iplan is put into place. It's not legally binding like an IEP but the school sets forth on what they're going to do to help the child, reading like an IEP. Basically it sets kids like Jane up for success. I think it's wonderful to catch those borderline kids and was thrilled that for fifth and sixth Jane's elementary was going to do everything possible to get Jane ready for middle school.
It was a great plan and for fifth grade worked fantastic until the school district got this fantastic idea to move sixth graders to middle school.
We lost sixth grade, half the time we had counted on, I had counted on, to prepare her for middle school. Jane freaked out at moving up and I worked hard to reassure her that we'd make it work.
Fifth grade ended and summer was okay. Jane was nervous, well we all were nervous but Jane had a couple of good friends she could lean on and I knew that would help. I remember how my good friends pulled me through those difficult times making it possible to keep going forward. Finally the first day of school arrived and Jane walked with her two friends. They continued to walk again through most of September.
Things were a bit more frustrating with what was happening inside the school.
The very first frustration was after being reassured that sixth graders would be kept at a sixth grade elementary format, the middle school put them on a rotating schedule going to different classes just like the seventh and eighth graders.
That was the beginning, then there was Jane's iplan. Even though the elementary had sent the iplan to the school and Jane tested extremely low in language comprehension (which HELLO, makes everything harder!), basically for eight weeks, the school said "we don't know what to do to help her." She was frustrated, we were frustrated. Finally I made some important connections getting her some help. To start with I contacted her math teacher, who was completely puzzled that Jane had never been exposed to long division. I explained that Jane was a resource room kid that had not yet reached grade level.
Light bulb moment for her teacher.
I explained that we had counted on the sixth grade to get her to level for seventh grade. *sigh* And we lost that chance when the school district kicked those kids to middle school. This teacher offered to help Jane after school two to three times a week and I encouraged Jane to see her. Within just a few weeks Jane's math improved tremendously.
Here was a child that had math explained in a room with five other students, thrust into a room with 30 students with language comprehension problems being told to perform at a level she hasn't even reached yet! And this was just math.
The school had an after school night the end of September (school had started mid-august) and Kent and I made sure to speak to every one of her teachers and we got some directions to move her forward and get her the help she needed. We felt good, most of her teachers recognized that she was struggling and wanted to help her. Her main teacher also was working to get her back into resource room.
This was a step in the right direction, then a week after this school night where we had talked with all of Jane's teacher we found out the middle school hadn't confirmed the states requirements for sixth graders. The state requires over a hundred minutes a day back to back, without interruption for the language arts. Since the middle school didn't follow through on the elementary school format and had them switching periods, they were not fulfilling the states requirements. So seven weeks into school after we had talked with and worked with Jane's teachers, Jane got a new schedule with all new teachers.
*frustration level rising*
And if this wasn't hard enough for Jane, her two friends, one of which she'd been best friends with since first grade dumped her. Said they didn't want to be friends with her anymore. Started crossing the street while walking home to get away from her. I haven't confirmed but I believe they decided to go with more popular "cool" people and Jane just didn't fit the bill. It was a crappy thing to do to Jane and school turned even more lonely.
Now I don't believe Jane was bullied or picked on more then anyone else, but she's sensitive, she internalizes making any teasing that much more painful.
When school started, I had expressed a desire to home school but acknowledged that with my schedule, it just wouldn't be possible for sixth grade. I have to give volunteer time at head start. The twins are also home on Mondays. Ean has a nightmarish rotating day schedule, going to school Tuesdays and Thursdays and every other Monday. The boys make an environment that is not conducive to serious learning. Trying to help Jane with homework with boys jumping all over us has worn my nerves to a frazzle as is. However I had a brainstorm.
My mom bought a house within walking distance. I talked with mom and she's agreed to help. Of course I would be Jane's primary teacher but my mom's house would be a perfect study hall. A quiet place to do school work without all the distractions our home has. I think Fridays will become Ean's special day with Mormor. That will give us one more day during the week with Ean free time, where we could focus one on one.
I talked with Jane. She completely balked at the idea. It was crazy talk. Not go to school?
We entered a balancing act of me trying to push Jane to understand what home schooling really involved and Kent stressing that it was HER choice and that it wouldn't happen unless Jane said so. I confess that stressing it was Jane's choice worried me because I didn't want her to continue on being miserable until she was beaten down and her esteem was in the toilet. I know it had to be her choice, but I worried that she'd hang in there until she just couldn't stand it anymore.
After talking to her dad about what it's like to be home schooled, she asked me if she could stay home one day and see what it was like. I let her know that one day wouldn't give a fair picture and she needed at least until the end of the year to really decide if she liked it or not. When I let her know that if she didn't like homeschooling, we'd register her for seventh grade at the middle school in the fall, She made her decision on Wednesday before school.
She asked if she could just stay home. :) I told her she needed to finish out the week. Get all the telephone numbers of her friends, people she wanted to stay in contact with and she needed to clean out her locker, return books ect.
Friday morning right after sending her off, I called the school and let them know.
Jane is already second guessing herself. The unfamiliar is always scary. I think she'll settle down quickly as we establish a routine. She was also disappointed when I took her booty from her locker and sorted out "all the good stuff" to put in the newly dubbed "school tubby".
So I am Jane's teacher. For everything. Wish us luck.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Wow language explosion!
Greg came running up to me this AM while stating "MOOOOM Ean he a pus(h)ing me" Well first, why do they always know how to elongate the vowel in "mom" and second, wow, we knew exactly what he was saying. So I told him, Greg tell him not to push you!
Except Ean is in the front yard on his way to school. So Greg runs over to the window, opens the window and starts yelling "Ean, you no pus(h)ing me, you no PUS(h)ING me!!" Well Dave has to start yelling at Ean too and Ean is just getting flustered and upset and trying to argue with them! Finally I got Ean to walk with Kate only to have him come back two minutes later crying because Kate kicked him.
Apparently I need to speak with Kate on using HER words. *eye roll*
Also David was just doing a headstand on the recliner, he started lowering and raising his legs while stating "UP.... DOWN... UP.... DOWN.... UP...." stopping every now and then to say "WOOK, I upSIDEdown" It was very cute. I am a tad jealous, I wish I had his abs. :-)
Completely changing the subject, onto me. I was a smidge annoyed when told that going veg is really going "overboard" Thanks honey. I didn't just decide on a whim, I put a lot of thought into my decision. It feels right TO ME, so it's something *I* need to do FOR ME. And don't worry, we can still go out for Mexican.
Speaking of Kent, it is kinda nice to get told that despite feeling like I was mean last year when I policed up the candy and let the kids have a little baggie of candy to work out of and then I gave as I deemed appropriate the rest of the their junk until gone, it was a far better system then the chaos of this year where I didn't police anything and the twins had a gorge fest on every one's loot.
Both boys are sick and I'm pretty sure it was the sugar that made Greg's cough so bad yesterday.
So no more sugar free for alls at our house. BLECH!!!!!!
Except Ean is in the front yard on his way to school. So Greg runs over to the window, opens the window and starts yelling "Ean, you no pus(h)ing me, you no PUS(h)ING me!!" Well Dave has to start yelling at Ean too and Ean is just getting flustered and upset and trying to argue with them! Finally I got Ean to walk with Kate only to have him come back two minutes later crying because Kate kicked him.
Apparently I need to speak with Kate on using HER words. *eye roll*
Also David was just doing a headstand on the recliner, he started lowering and raising his legs while stating "UP.... DOWN... UP.... DOWN.... UP...." stopping every now and then to say "WOOK, I upSIDEdown" It was very cute. I am a tad jealous, I wish I had his abs. :-)
Completely changing the subject, onto me. I was a smidge annoyed when told that going veg is really going "overboard" Thanks honey. I didn't just decide on a whim, I put a lot of thought into my decision. It feels right TO ME, so it's something *I* need to do FOR ME. And don't worry, we can still go out for Mexican.
Speaking of Kent, it is kinda nice to get told that despite feeling like I was mean last year when I policed up the candy and let the kids have a little baggie of candy to work out of and then I gave as I deemed appropriate the rest of the their junk until gone, it was a far better system then the chaos of this year where I didn't police anything and the twins had a gorge fest on every one's loot.
Both boys are sick and I'm pretty sure it was the sugar that made Greg's cough so bad yesterday.
So no more sugar free for alls at our house. BLECH!!!!!!
Friday, October 30, 2009
Why go Vegetarian?
I made a decision last week and I'm going veg. To my best friend Kim who spent a large portion of her adult life allergic to meat protein, yes I'm doing this on purpose.
I could write a long drawn out post on all the health benefits then throw in the cruelty of slaughter but the fact is, I'm not a huge meat fan.
Oh I've enjoyed a good burger, and there are a few things (ham is my fave at Christmas time) that I'll miss but overall meat grosses me out. To prepare it, I can't deal with extra bones and fat. I have to work to not completely lose my stomach while cutting those parts out. *shudder* It's always been that way and I've done it anyway because well, wasn't that what I was suppose to do?
Kent is also a big meat and potatoes person. That's how he was raised. He enjoys meat and really, I don't have a problem with that. I was thinking though, I do need to make my decisions FOR ME not because of other people. Oh I don't mean that I'll do whatever the hell I want without thinking of my family. I mean that when there's something within my control that affects me and me alone, then I need to follow my heart.
Well I guess I can't say it'll only affect me, I will be serving more veggie dishes during meals but I'll try to work in my husbands favorites as well because I love him and he feels that love when I go to the effort of making something I know he'll enjoy.
I won't be eating vegan, it would be to hard to eliminate dairy and eggs from my diet. And I'm not opposed to eating dairy although I will try to cut down.
I feel good about my decision and I feel extremely good about what I've been eating. Really isn't that what counts?
I could write a long drawn out post on all the health benefits then throw in the cruelty of slaughter but the fact is, I'm not a huge meat fan.
Oh I've enjoyed a good burger, and there are a few things (ham is my fave at Christmas time) that I'll miss but overall meat grosses me out. To prepare it, I can't deal with extra bones and fat. I have to work to not completely lose my stomach while cutting those parts out. *shudder* It's always been that way and I've done it anyway because well, wasn't that what I was suppose to do?
Kent is also a big meat and potatoes person. That's how he was raised. He enjoys meat and really, I don't have a problem with that. I was thinking though, I do need to make my decisions FOR ME not because of other people. Oh I don't mean that I'll do whatever the hell I want without thinking of my family. I mean that when there's something within my control that affects me and me alone, then I need to follow my heart.
Well I guess I can't say it'll only affect me, I will be serving more veggie dishes during meals but I'll try to work in my husbands favorites as well because I love him and he feels that love when I go to the effort of making something I know he'll enjoy.
I won't be eating vegan, it would be to hard to eliminate dairy and eggs from my diet. And I'm not opposed to eating dairy although I will try to cut down.
I feel good about my decision and I feel extremely good about what I've been eating. Really isn't that what counts?
Cabbage night
Tonight is cabbage night. The night before Halloween. A night of general mischief over multiple townships. At least it's cabbage night if you live in or around the town of Bennington Vermont. Thankfully cabbage night isn't honored in Pocatello. Really who NEEDS one more night of general mischief to smash pumpkins of porches and throw eggs at your best friends car.
I will freely admit that I enjoyed walking to school on the 31st thoroughly enjoying the carnage of more eggs and pumpkins then I could have imagined. Even in grade school I marveled at the energy spent on the mayhem and as a teen I was highly amused when the local news would report that the Stewart's on Main street had been forbidden to sell eggs to anyone under the age of 25.
I mean really. You were ID'd for E G G S. *laugh*
Ahhhhh, memories.
My mom reminded me just yesterday morning that we always had applesauce with our oatmeal. I am not a huge oatmeal fan but a friend has introduced me to "germade" a cream of wheat type cereal and I really enjoy steel cut oats and I find myself reaching for the applesauce frequently, choosing that over any other additive. I hadn't realized it stemmed from my childhood.
It is funny how things come back to us. I was telling mom yesterday that I found an identical MP3 player with 12 more gigs of memory. I was sorely tempted and freely admitted that I was channeling my dad. Yes I was stupid to wash my MP3 player and it hasn't shown a spark of life, I believe it's DEAD for sure. So why not go bigger and better!!
Mom then pointed out that I was NOT channeling my dad because I was merely lusting after it, dad would have already bought it.
Good point.
As I think of my childhood and my memories, I wonder what kind of impression my children will have of our home when they're adults. I hope out of everything they bring out of their childhood, they remember first and foremost how much we love them. Each and every one of them. I hope they carry good and positive values. I hope they have a sense of humor. That they approach life knowing that nothing is as permanent or important as your family.
And maybe they'll remember their mom likes applesauce on her hot cereal. :-)
I will freely admit that I enjoyed walking to school on the 31st thoroughly enjoying the carnage of more eggs and pumpkins then I could have imagined. Even in grade school I marveled at the energy spent on the mayhem and as a teen I was highly amused when the local news would report that the Stewart's on Main street had been forbidden to sell eggs to anyone under the age of 25.
I mean really. You were ID'd for E G G S. *laugh*
Ahhhhh, memories.
My mom reminded me just yesterday morning that we always had applesauce with our oatmeal. I am not a huge oatmeal fan but a friend has introduced me to "germade" a cream of wheat type cereal and I really enjoy steel cut oats and I find myself reaching for the applesauce frequently, choosing that over any other additive. I hadn't realized it stemmed from my childhood.
It is funny how things come back to us. I was telling mom yesterday that I found an identical MP3 player with 12 more gigs of memory. I was sorely tempted and freely admitted that I was channeling my dad. Yes I was stupid to wash my MP3 player and it hasn't shown a spark of life, I believe it's DEAD for sure. So why not go bigger and better!!
Mom then pointed out that I was NOT channeling my dad because I was merely lusting after it, dad would have already bought it.
Good point.
As I think of my childhood and my memories, I wonder what kind of impression my children will have of our home when they're adults. I hope out of everything they bring out of their childhood, they remember first and foremost how much we love them. Each and every one of them. I hope they carry good and positive values. I hope they have a sense of humor. That they approach life knowing that nothing is as permanent or important as your family.
And maybe they'll remember their mom likes applesauce on her hot cereal. :-)
Thursday, October 29, 2009
So I'm pushing Kate out the door
She's 10 minutes late. I'm telling her to RUN RUN RUN. She shuts the door. I hear the doorknob, turn to see the door open and she looks at me, smiles and says "I'm suppose to bring treats for the Halloween party".
Well sheesh honey, let me go get a bag O whatever I have lying around. Cause bags of junk are my THING and we have cupboards FULL of options.
Do you think cream of wheat would have gone over well?
In other Hill news, for some reason that I cannot fathom, when washing her little brothers off in the tub, Jane does not check the water temperature. Apparently the boys screaming isn't a clue either. She runs it ice cold.
Those poor boys.
I can't seem to get it through her head, to check the damn water and if they're screaming, SOMETHING IS WRONG.
So I washed her hair last night in the sink, in ice cold water. Mean? Probably. She sure shrieked but hopefully she remembers her brothers next time.
Oh the bus. I put the boys on the bus yesterday and within twenty minutes got a call to meet the bus at school because Greg was sick. Oh joy. So I threw on clothes and unshowered (blech) I hauled my ucky self to the school and found out Greg was fine, it was David and he was coughing. So I asked his teacher if he should stay home and she said no. I let her know I'd be home and to call if he needed to be picked up.
He was kinda puny and is still coughing so even though I didn't pick him up early yesterday, he's staying home today.
Hopefully someone can pick Greg up so I'm not having to bring both Ean (home from K) and Dave to school for Greg.
Throw in all the crap from work and the office that left AGAIN over a hundred pounds of pamphlet's to throw out, I'm a bit crabby.
Happy Halloween.
Well sheesh honey, let me go get a bag O whatever I have lying around. Cause bags of junk are my THING and we have cupboards FULL of options.
Do you think cream of wheat would have gone over well?
In other Hill news, for some reason that I cannot fathom, when washing her little brothers off in the tub, Jane does not check the water temperature. Apparently the boys screaming isn't a clue either. She runs it ice cold.
Those poor boys.
I can't seem to get it through her head, to check the damn water and if they're screaming, SOMETHING IS WRONG.
So I washed her hair last night in the sink, in ice cold water. Mean? Probably. She sure shrieked but hopefully she remembers her brothers next time.
Oh the bus. I put the boys on the bus yesterday and within twenty minutes got a call to meet the bus at school because Greg was sick. Oh joy. So I threw on clothes and unshowered (blech) I hauled my ucky self to the school and found out Greg was fine, it was David and he was coughing. So I asked his teacher if he should stay home and she said no. I let her know I'd be home and to call if he needed to be picked up.
He was kinda puny and is still coughing so even though I didn't pick him up early yesterday, he's staying home today.
Hopefully someone can pick Greg up so I'm not having to bring both Ean (home from K) and Dave to school for Greg.
Throw in all the crap from work and the office that left AGAIN over a hundred pounds of pamphlet's to throw out, I'm a bit crabby.
Happy Halloween.
Just a quick post
To remind everyone to check their pockets before doing laundry.
No matter how gross your pants are because you cleaned vomit up off from the underside of the toilet bowl and had no choice but to sit on the nasty bathroom floor.
No matter how tired you are because the idiots in Blue Cross believe custodial services include the expectation of having the janitor dump over a 100 pounds of pamphlets in one night.
No matter how distracted you are because you're trying to get out the door with Ean screaming he can't find his shoes *exasperated wave of the hands* again.
Because if you fail to check your pockets you just might wash your MP3 player in the wash and then when your husband comes home to you in tears, the only good part is that he knows you're beating yourself up enough that he doesn't tease you.
So work without music. HARD! Feeling really dumb? HARDER! Enduring the jokes that are sure to come the next few weeks? IMPOSSIBLE!!!
*sigh*
No matter how gross your pants are because you cleaned vomit up off from the underside of the toilet bowl and had no choice but to sit on the nasty bathroom floor.
No matter how tired you are because the idiots in Blue Cross believe custodial services include the expectation of having the janitor dump over a 100 pounds of pamphlets in one night.
No matter how distracted you are because you're trying to get out the door with Ean screaming he can't find his shoes *exasperated wave of the hands* again.
Because if you fail to check your pockets you just might wash your MP3 player in the wash and then when your husband comes home to you in tears, the only good part is that he knows you're beating yourself up enough that he doesn't tease you.
So work without music. HARD! Feeling really dumb? HARDER! Enduring the jokes that are sure to come the next few weeks? IMPOSSIBLE!!!
*sigh*
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
MOooooooooom, you can't do that?!!
What can't I do? Apparently I am incapable of carving a pumpkin. I am worthy to scrub toilets, do laundry, can jelly and jam for her to consume but according to my eleven year old, I don't know how to carve a pumpkin.
She uh, has trouble looking outside the box. *laugh*
Well in spite of her lack of confidence in my ability, I plowed forward and carved away tonight. I bought three big pumpkins for the kids, actually food stamps bought the pumpkins, apparently because they're edible. Not that I plan on serving them after they've been sitting on front stoop rotting for a week, but commentary on the system will be saved for another time.
Right now, the kids! Kate in her usual fashion to make sure she was the most special, claimed the largest pumpkin. Jane didn't care, she was just excited to do one. The twins both took a turn pulling out pumpkin guts but neither cared for the overall experience and quickly turned the pumpkin they were working on over to Ean.
Jane relished every squishy ounce of gooey guts. I think the gutting is her favorite part. After the insides were outside enough to work on, I brought out a magic marker and we worked on the faces.
I did Ean's first. He was easy. I've noticed he shuns away from art, feeling far more capable of the concrete world of letters and numbers then the abstract "draw a face". So when he proclaimed (loudly because Ean doesn't do anything softly) he wanted his pumpkin to say BOO and BOO is spelled B O O, I wasn't surprised at his choice. I was surprised that he knew how to spell BOO. *laugh* So I managed a B carved with a straight stick line and two crescents and did just ovals for the Os. It looked very nice, even if I was proclaimed inept with large orange gourds.
Kate was a bit more of a challenge. She had a tall pumpkin and drew two tiny eyes and a tiny nose up top. The face just screamed for a large smiling mouth. Kate was determined the mouth needed lots of teeth. Lots of teeny tiny pointed teeth both at the top and the bottom. She got as far as the top when I told her she was done. There was no way I was cutting through two inches of pale pumpkin flesh to make a dozen teeth in a row.
So I quickly cut two big teeth and a big mouth.
Kate took my change in plans surprisingly well. That was a shock. However she was pleased with the results and chose to enjoy the existence of her pumpkin rather then dwell on her mother not following her directions. It was a good choice and showed a streak of maturity that I seldom see in her.
Jane had an elaborate mouth with simple eyes and nose. It turned out very cute. Er, I mean SCARY. :-)
The twins were properly impressed with all three of them and hopefully don't freak out when they realize they're not on the table. I put them on the front steps after work.
YaY for Pumpkins!
She uh, has trouble looking outside the box. *laugh*
Well in spite of her lack of confidence in my ability, I plowed forward and carved away tonight. I bought three big pumpkins for the kids, actually food stamps bought the pumpkins, apparently because they're edible. Not that I plan on serving them after they've been sitting on front stoop rotting for a week, but commentary on the system will be saved for another time.
Right now, the kids! Kate in her usual fashion to make sure she was the most special, claimed the largest pumpkin. Jane didn't care, she was just excited to do one. The twins both took a turn pulling out pumpkin guts but neither cared for the overall experience and quickly turned the pumpkin they were working on over to Ean.
Jane relished every squishy ounce of gooey guts. I think the gutting is her favorite part. After the insides were outside enough to work on, I brought out a magic marker and we worked on the faces.
I did Ean's first. He was easy. I've noticed he shuns away from art, feeling far more capable of the concrete world of letters and numbers then the abstract "draw a face". So when he proclaimed (loudly because Ean doesn't do anything softly) he wanted his pumpkin to say BOO and BOO is spelled B O O, I wasn't surprised at his choice. I was surprised that he knew how to spell BOO. *laugh* So I managed a B carved with a straight stick line and two crescents and did just ovals for the Os. It looked very nice, even if I was proclaimed inept with large orange gourds.
Kate was a bit more of a challenge. She had a tall pumpkin and drew two tiny eyes and a tiny nose up top. The face just screamed for a large smiling mouth. Kate was determined the mouth needed lots of teeth. Lots of teeny tiny pointed teeth both at the top and the bottom. She got as far as the top when I told her she was done. There was no way I was cutting through two inches of pale pumpkin flesh to make a dozen teeth in a row.
So I quickly cut two big teeth and a big mouth.
Kate took my change in plans surprisingly well. That was a shock. However she was pleased with the results and chose to enjoy the existence of her pumpkin rather then dwell on her mother not following her directions. It was a good choice and showed a streak of maturity that I seldom see in her.
Jane had an elaborate mouth with simple eyes and nose. It turned out very cute. Er, I mean SCARY. :-)
The twins were properly impressed with all three of them and hopefully don't freak out when they realize they're not on the table. I put them on the front steps after work.
YaY for Pumpkins!
Monday, October 26, 2009
LALALALALALALALA onion LALALALALALALALA
Last night I tried a new recipe from my all time favorite vegetarian cookbook. It was a yummy corn chowder that I served with sorta homemade bread, you know, the loaves you can buy frozen in the freezer section and then raise, bake and serve as your own. Genius I tell you!
Anyway the chowder started with sauteing a whole diced onion. I had Kate get me the onion. Immediately the questions started because as far as Kate is concerned, anything with onions is borderline evil. She has actually gotten into a good deal of trouble because her little brother whom formerly couldn't give a sour pickle about onions has begun to repeat verbatim his sister's objections to the innocent vegetable.
So the scene plays out as follows.
Kate, please get me an onion.
Mooooom, you're not going to put onions in there???
Uh no honey, not a single onion.
Please note I'm dicing and sauteing the evil onion as this conversation is going on. As the conversation continues, I add other soup ingredients and Kate watched me add everything. Eventually soup is served.
The killer moment, Eans says "Hey, is this an onion???" very suspicious like. Kate immediately responds that NO EAN, There are NO onions in there! Ean doubtfully shows me the offending vegetable and asked what it was, I said "Vegetable" and he said "OK" and that was that.
Oh my, Kent almost spat out his soup trying not to laugh. It was a nice diversion from a dinner deemed only "edible" by my husband who is not a soup fan.
:-)
Anyway the chowder started with sauteing a whole diced onion. I had Kate get me the onion. Immediately the questions started because as far as Kate is concerned, anything with onions is borderline evil. She has actually gotten into a good deal of trouble because her little brother whom formerly couldn't give a sour pickle about onions has begun to repeat verbatim his sister's objections to the innocent vegetable.
So the scene plays out as follows.
Kate, please get me an onion.
Mooooom, you're not going to put onions in there???
Uh no honey, not a single onion.
Please note I'm dicing and sauteing the evil onion as this conversation is going on. As the conversation continues, I add other soup ingredients and Kate watched me add everything. Eventually soup is served.
The killer moment, Eans says "Hey, is this an onion???" very suspicious like. Kate immediately responds that NO EAN, There are NO onions in there! Ean doubtfully shows me the offending vegetable and asked what it was, I said "Vegetable" and he said "OK" and that was that.
Oh my, Kent almost spat out his soup trying not to laugh. It was a nice diversion from a dinner deemed only "edible" by my husband who is not a soup fan.
:-)
Sunday, October 25, 2009
The Primary Program
Once a year the Primary (children's organization at church) puts on a program in the fall. The kids sing lots of songs, there's usually a theme and everyone has a part that they say into the mike.
Really, the parts are the best part if you're going for entertainment, especially if it's one of my kids. When Kate was four, she talked for three solid minutes. Now her actual part was maybe nine words but she took it upon herself to express herself. No one actually understood her, but she made it clear she was going to finish what she was saying.
It was great!
The twins are sunbeams this year, that's the youngest class when children graduate from the nursery. Toddlers move up the first Sunday in January after their third birthday. Since the twins were born December twenty first, boom, they were in primary the next week. Throw in their language delays then you realize what a challenge the primary workers have with the boys.
For reasons completely unclear to me, the primary rehearsed before Sacrament meeting. This means children are in their seats (except for saying parts and standing up to sing) for almost three hours when it's all said and done. That's way to much, especially for the little people. About twenty minutes before sacrament meeting started, the twins decided they were done. They hugged me, we got drinks, they hugged my in laws who came to see their grandchildren in the program.
A few minutes before starting, the Primary president came to round up the twins. Greg was up there only for a minute when an older woman (who can come across as cranky) carried Greg off the stand and delivered him to me while muttering "He can come back when he learns to control himself."
Really, there are only two choices, be upset and offended or recognize the humor at an adult being annoyed with a child for being, well, a child. I chose amusement. However I did want Greg to have the experience of saying his part, so I kept my eye out for a time to take him back up. Turns out my diligence was complete unnecessary. Greg walked up all on his own. Granted it was in the middle of Sacrament but I figured I'd cause my problems trying to catch him as he dodged young men carrying trays full of little cups of water.
Someone captured him up front and he apparently stayed amused long enough to say his part. He did fantastic! Actually all of the kids did. However Greg spent the rest of the meeting going back and forth between the stand and our row. I just let him and my MIL noted that he carefully avoided the cranky lady the rest of the service. *laugh*
The biggest surprise was Ean's absolute enthusiasm for singing! Luckily he really enjoys singing, and hopefully he can be a good influence on the men in the family that only sing "sometimes" *cough* *cough*
Yes Kent will be annoyed I called him on not singing in church but hey, it's my blog. :-)
And in all fairness, it was his mother that called him on it first today.
Really, the parts are the best part if you're going for entertainment, especially if it's one of my kids. When Kate was four, she talked for three solid minutes. Now her actual part was maybe nine words but she took it upon herself to express herself. No one actually understood her, but she made it clear she was going to finish what she was saying.
It was great!
The twins are sunbeams this year, that's the youngest class when children graduate from the nursery. Toddlers move up the first Sunday in January after their third birthday. Since the twins were born December twenty first, boom, they were in primary the next week. Throw in their language delays then you realize what a challenge the primary workers have with the boys.
For reasons completely unclear to me, the primary rehearsed before Sacrament meeting. This means children are in their seats (except for saying parts and standing up to sing) for almost three hours when it's all said and done. That's way to much, especially for the little people. About twenty minutes before sacrament meeting started, the twins decided they were done. They hugged me, we got drinks, they hugged my in laws who came to see their grandchildren in the program.
A few minutes before starting, the Primary president came to round up the twins. Greg was up there only for a minute when an older woman (who can come across as cranky) carried Greg off the stand and delivered him to me while muttering "He can come back when he learns to control himself."
Really, there are only two choices, be upset and offended or recognize the humor at an adult being annoyed with a child for being, well, a child. I chose amusement. However I did want Greg to have the experience of saying his part, so I kept my eye out for a time to take him back up. Turns out my diligence was complete unnecessary. Greg walked up all on his own. Granted it was in the middle of Sacrament but I figured I'd cause my problems trying to catch him as he dodged young men carrying trays full of little cups of water.
Someone captured him up front and he apparently stayed amused long enough to say his part. He did fantastic! Actually all of the kids did. However Greg spent the rest of the meeting going back and forth between the stand and our row. I just let him and my MIL noted that he carefully avoided the cranky lady the rest of the service. *laugh*
The biggest surprise was Ean's absolute enthusiasm for singing! Luckily he really enjoys singing, and hopefully he can be a good influence on the men in the family that only sing "sometimes" *cough* *cough*
Yes Kent will be annoyed I called him on not singing in church but hey, it's my blog. :-)
And in all fairness, it was his mother that called him on it first today.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
The Power of LANGUAGE and the ensuing arguments
As with all of our children, speech has been a struggle. Well more acurately, speech with Jane, Kate and Ean has been a struggle. David and Greg have had language problems which due the abstract nature are much harder to understand and treat. Good clean articulation problems, man, I can do that! The language just not coming, or just not comprehending, I really have been at a loss on how to help them.
Really Jane had a bit of language too and it really impacted her learning. She still struggles with comprehension, especially when reading. She can read the words but not get a drop of meaning from a text. It makes school challenging to say the least.
I hope the twins don't have oncoming issues like Jane has but if they do, we'll do everything we can to help them, just like we do Jane.
My point in all this is to state that even though the twins are almost four language is really just emerging for them. Especially for Greg, projecting his wants and desires is a whole new world for him and it's exciting!!!
Along with the excitment is the confusion that results from two boys that don't have the best comprehesion and a limited ability to understand what's spoken to them. The results, even though it's frustrating for them, it's pretty funny for everyone else observing them. So their first big argument tackled with words and not pushing, shoving, biting or other forms of personal attack was on their names.
See, David knows his name is David and Greg knows his name is Greg. This actually was a concern for more as recent as four months ago. See they used their names interchangably not recognizing themselves as seperate individuals. Yeah, they got over that.
So much so they spent Thursday night declaring their seperate identies and getting mad their brother didn't understand. The dialog went pretty much as follows.
"NO, I DAVID!"
"NOoooo!!! I am Geg!"
"No No NO! I ih (is) David!"
Repeat repeat repeat for 10 minutes with escalating tone and anger and you pretty much get the whole picture.
*laugh*
I think it's pretty funny although I missed the exchange, it happened while I was work. The boys were kind enough to give me a private showing this am while waiting for the bus. This time instead of both stating facts they actually were fighting over seperate opinions! Cool, maybe they're evolving. :-) It was about the mini-van with one twin stating it was "Mommy's car" and the other saying it was "Daddy's car." As if the boys needed help, Ean tried to correct both of them. You know, cause there wasn't enough confusion that AM.
Of course the fun really begins now. As amusing as their exchanges are now, it won't take very long before they become very annoying. Throw in the their sibblings willingness to argue with three year olds, I'm wondering if I should buy more ear plugs.
The girls are both discharged from speech and have been for over a year but Ean is still in speech. So all three boys. Although the twin's language is challenging because language is a more difficult problem to deal with, Ean's speech teacher has a whole different problem even though his actual speech is very fixable.
She can't get him to stop talking long enough to correct what he says.
Life is fun. Kid do make it funner. lol
Really Jane had a bit of language too and it really impacted her learning. She still struggles with comprehension, especially when reading. She can read the words but not get a drop of meaning from a text. It makes school challenging to say the least.
I hope the twins don't have oncoming issues like Jane has but if they do, we'll do everything we can to help them, just like we do Jane.
My point in all this is to state that even though the twins are almost four language is really just emerging for them. Especially for Greg, projecting his wants and desires is a whole new world for him and it's exciting!!!
Along with the excitment is the confusion that results from two boys that don't have the best comprehesion and a limited ability to understand what's spoken to them. The results, even though it's frustrating for them, it's pretty funny for everyone else observing them. So their first big argument tackled with words and not pushing, shoving, biting or other forms of personal attack was on their names.
See, David knows his name is David and Greg knows his name is Greg. This actually was a concern for more as recent as four months ago. See they used their names interchangably not recognizing themselves as seperate individuals. Yeah, they got over that.
So much so they spent Thursday night declaring their seperate identies and getting mad their brother didn't understand. The dialog went pretty much as follows.
"NO, I DAVID!"
"NOoooo!!! I am Geg!"
"No No NO! I ih (is) David!"
Repeat repeat repeat for 10 minutes with escalating tone and anger and you pretty much get the whole picture.
*laugh*
I think it's pretty funny although I missed the exchange, it happened while I was work. The boys were kind enough to give me a private showing this am while waiting for the bus. This time instead of both stating facts they actually were fighting over seperate opinions! Cool, maybe they're evolving. :-) It was about the mini-van with one twin stating it was "Mommy's car" and the other saying it was "Daddy's car." As if the boys needed help, Ean tried to correct both of them. You know, cause there wasn't enough confusion that AM.
Of course the fun really begins now. As amusing as their exchanges are now, it won't take very long before they become very annoying. Throw in the their sibblings willingness to argue with three year olds, I'm wondering if I should buy more ear plugs.
The girls are both discharged from speech and have been for over a year but Ean is still in speech. So all three boys. Although the twin's language is challenging because language is a more difficult problem to deal with, Ean's speech teacher has a whole different problem even though his actual speech is very fixable.
She can't get him to stop talking long enough to correct what he says.
Life is fun. Kid do make it funner. lol
Friday, October 23, 2009
Really, why make vegetable stock in the middle of the night?
It's late, I'd rather be sleeping but I want to have some done. I'm trying a new recipe this weekend, a corn chowder that sounds just yummy but I need to have the stock done and there just won't be time tomorrow.
Oh I *could* have done it earlier, if I hadn't taken the work key to my friend, had to visit as she cleaned out her closet and I tried on clothes. What's a girl to do when a friend is willing and eager to share her wardrobe that longer fits??? And I can't be offended that they're to large for her and they fit me. See we've both been losing but since her trouble spots are different then mine, I get the clothes that no longer fit.
Then there was the trip to the store. I wanted some veggies and had brand new wic checks to use. Now I knew it'd be an experience since I haven't used the new ones yet and finally you can be fruits and veggies!! How awesome is that?! Each child is allotted six dollars per month and it has to be in one shot. No change is given, so choose wisely, any amount over needs to be paid for by the customer. So carefully picked out my veggies, with a huge pack of mixed peppers for $4.99 and a package of carrots for $.99 I figure I couldn't make it any easier. Put that on one check, and I had some grapes and a squash to put towards the other check.
Of course with the twins, I had two produce checks and planned on using them both tonight hence the careful choice of the first two veggies to simplify grocery shopping.
Well I knew checking out would be fun. Fred Meyer was swamped, lines extended well into the grocery aisles, a frantic manager trying to clear up traffic and keep the lines moving. It was really rather funny.
So I get moved into a newly opened line, I carefully put both checks down followed by my peppers and carrots, a W I D E space separating the peppers and carrots from the rest of the produce and then everything else. So the gal starts checking me out, I'm kinda spacing but then I look up and see she's run all my produce together into one order.
Okaaaaaay. I'm thinking, well that'S different but maybe you can deduct the produce from the whole order. I've never used the checks before and I flat out don't know. She then asks the neighboring cashier on what to press for the check, I'm thinking maybe she doesn't know after all? I think, well we will just have to see.
Yeah, she didn't know.
After she questions a smattering of coworkers the frantic manager comes over to help. I start to get annoyed. Not because it's crowded and she hasn't learned the ins and outs of the new check but because the checker kept saying "SHE'D like to know if SHE can run both checks through this order", like *I* was the one asking. I finally said to her "NO, Y O U are the one asking, I'm here shopping for groceries.
It's confirmed that each check needs to be it's own order (DANG, it'd be easier to subtract multiple checks!) and the manager gets a wide eyed, wild look as he tries to figure out how to fix my order. You have to keep in mind the wic check has already been processed so really the order was "set". I figure the rest of my groceries are going on food stamps anyway, so I asked for the unused check back so I can use it next week. The look of gratitude from the manager was downright embarrassing.
I did make a point of saying "Now you know you have to do each check in a separate order" while also pointing out that I had separated the veggies so she could do each check separately. She looked rather odd as she stated "that would have been easier". Really? Ya think? *laugh*
Well then there was the poor woman in the monster pick up that had stalled. She couldn't get the door open, had a child in a car seat in the car. I didn't have my phone, a nice man helped her, as we used the suburban to jump her. It didn't work and she went to find a phone to call her husband. Oh well I tried.
All this to say, yeah, fifteen minutes left to a yummy vegetable broth, that I'll still need to drain before actually getting a little shut eye. Hope this new recipe is worth it!
Oh I *could* have done it earlier, if I hadn't taken the work key to my friend, had to visit as she cleaned out her closet and I tried on clothes. What's a girl to do when a friend is willing and eager to share her wardrobe that longer fits??? And I can't be offended that they're to large for her and they fit me. See we've both been losing but since her trouble spots are different then mine, I get the clothes that no longer fit.
Then there was the trip to the store. I wanted some veggies and had brand new wic checks to use. Now I knew it'd be an experience since I haven't used the new ones yet and finally you can be fruits and veggies!! How awesome is that?! Each child is allotted six dollars per month and it has to be in one shot. No change is given, so choose wisely, any amount over needs to be paid for by the customer. So carefully picked out my veggies, with a huge pack of mixed peppers for $4.99 and a package of carrots for $.99 I figure I couldn't make it any easier. Put that on one check, and I had some grapes and a squash to put towards the other check.
Of course with the twins, I had two produce checks and planned on using them both tonight hence the careful choice of the first two veggies to simplify grocery shopping.
Well I knew checking out would be fun. Fred Meyer was swamped, lines extended well into the grocery aisles, a frantic manager trying to clear up traffic and keep the lines moving. It was really rather funny.
So I get moved into a newly opened line, I carefully put both checks down followed by my peppers and carrots, a W I D E space separating the peppers and carrots from the rest of the produce and then everything else. So the gal starts checking me out, I'm kinda spacing but then I look up and see she's run all my produce together into one order.
Okaaaaaay. I'm thinking, well that'S different but maybe you can deduct the produce from the whole order. I've never used the checks before and I flat out don't know. She then asks the neighboring cashier on what to press for the check, I'm thinking maybe she doesn't know after all? I think, well we will just have to see.
Yeah, she didn't know.
After she questions a smattering of coworkers the frantic manager comes over to help. I start to get annoyed. Not because it's crowded and she hasn't learned the ins and outs of the new check but because the checker kept saying "SHE'D like to know if SHE can run both checks through this order", like *I* was the one asking. I finally said to her "NO, Y O U are the one asking, I'm here shopping for groceries.
It's confirmed that each check needs to be it's own order (DANG, it'd be easier to subtract multiple checks!) and the manager gets a wide eyed, wild look as he tries to figure out how to fix my order. You have to keep in mind the wic check has already been processed so really the order was "set". I figure the rest of my groceries are going on food stamps anyway, so I asked for the unused check back so I can use it next week. The look of gratitude from the manager was downright embarrassing.
I did make a point of saying "Now you know you have to do each check in a separate order" while also pointing out that I had separated the veggies so she could do each check separately. She looked rather odd as she stated "that would have been easier". Really? Ya think? *laugh*
Well then there was the poor woman in the monster pick up that had stalled. She couldn't get the door open, had a child in a car seat in the car. I didn't have my phone, a nice man helped her, as we used the suburban to jump her. It didn't work and she went to find a phone to call her husband. Oh well I tried.
All this to say, yeah, fifteen minutes left to a yummy vegetable broth, that I'll still need to drain before actually getting a little shut eye. Hope this new recipe is worth it!
Saturday, October 17, 2009
One Saturday, down the tubes!
The day started out fine, we went to the model train display this am. Once a month the model train club lets the public in to see the trains and well, we have boys that adore trains! With Greg on my shoulders, occasionally grabbing my face to turn my head *was not appreciated, Greg!* if I was going the wrong direction we wandered for about forty minutes.
The kids loved it.
Then my big plans included cleaning the kitchen and some canning. I have grape jelly to do along with applesauce. I wouldn't have finished the applesauce today but I could have put a big dent in my apples. Kent planned on some smallish chores and some good TV watching, since he's still feeling puny from his cold.
I made myself lunch after the trains. A nice salad with mushrooms, garden tomato and some shredded cheese. The salad just screamed for a little extra something, I decided beans. A little healthy protein would be great so I went to the storage room, stared at the shelves debating whether I was in the mood for Garbanzo or for black beans.
Garbanzos stood out and I reached to get the can off the shelf. My ever alert self finally realized there was water dripping from somewhere close by. I looked closely, saw one of the cardboard boxes on the shelf was wet. Started moving stuff around and realized a whole lot of the shelf was wet. Finally I reached the back of the shelf and couldn't see what was leaking but it was in the back behind two huge shelves full of food storage.
Great.
I called Kent to break the news that his plans for the day had changed. He was thrilled of course!
After Kent came home the chore of emptying the storage shelves began. This already large task was make even more cumbersome with the dodging and footwork required to step over and around five children and one dog determined to see what all the action was about. Thankfully the dog was put out and the children put to work, it only took twenty minutes or so to empty the shelves. They'll be super fun to reorganize too! Please note the sarcasm there.
The pipe that was leaking was soldered on one end, meaning some serious work and Kent doesn't own anything to solder with. He called his dad who was coming back into town after a morning at the temple. He would have to change clothes before coming down. Kent turned off the water and all the kids suddenly realized they were dying of thirst. Really, any moment they were going to keel over. Ean and Kate were the most dramatic, what a shocker!
Kent and I talked and decided that since we were going to have to take that pipe apart anyway, we might as well buy a water softener to go there. The area was already set up, there had been a softener there previously when we purchased the house, however it was a rental unit and just don't believe in renting and couldn't afford our own softener, so we've dealt with seriously hard water pretty much the whole decade we've been in the house.
I'm so tired of crappy glasses, the hard water just coats our dishes. A chance to get away from that! WOOT!
So after a very long afternoon and evening with several trips for parts, really loud children fighting over a big box and pizza from Costco (cause we had not water to cook with!) it finally got installed. YAY!!!
The day wasn't a complete loss. I did pick a whole lot of apples, and had kids pick apples at Marja's old house. Not that I know when I'll get to make applesauce!!
Completely off topic, I'll throw in that you should always check your pre-schoolers hand before letting them get on the bus, especially if you shared mini Altoids earlier in the morning during a rough spot. Do this every single time, because the one time you don't your three year old will take the Altoids to school, clutched in his fist and when his teacher sees it, she just might have a mini heart attack thinking it's a pill, cause it does look like a pill.
Don't ask me how I know this.
The kids loved it.
Then my big plans included cleaning the kitchen and some canning. I have grape jelly to do along with applesauce. I wouldn't have finished the applesauce today but I could have put a big dent in my apples. Kent planned on some smallish chores and some good TV watching, since he's still feeling puny from his cold.
I made myself lunch after the trains. A nice salad with mushrooms, garden tomato and some shredded cheese. The salad just screamed for a little extra something, I decided beans. A little healthy protein would be great so I went to the storage room, stared at the shelves debating whether I was in the mood for Garbanzo or for black beans.
Garbanzos stood out and I reached to get the can off the shelf. My ever alert self finally realized there was water dripping from somewhere close by. I looked closely, saw one of the cardboard boxes on the shelf was wet. Started moving stuff around and realized a whole lot of the shelf was wet. Finally I reached the back of the shelf and couldn't see what was leaking but it was in the back behind two huge shelves full of food storage.
Great.
I called Kent to break the news that his plans for the day had changed. He was thrilled of course!
After Kent came home the chore of emptying the storage shelves began. This already large task was make even more cumbersome with the dodging and footwork required to step over and around five children and one dog determined to see what all the action was about. Thankfully the dog was put out and the children put to work, it only took twenty minutes or so to empty the shelves. They'll be super fun to reorganize too! Please note the sarcasm there.
The pipe that was leaking was soldered on one end, meaning some serious work and Kent doesn't own anything to solder with. He called his dad who was coming back into town after a morning at the temple. He would have to change clothes before coming down. Kent turned off the water and all the kids suddenly realized they were dying of thirst. Really, any moment they were going to keel over. Ean and Kate were the most dramatic, what a shocker!
Kent and I talked and decided that since we were going to have to take that pipe apart anyway, we might as well buy a water softener to go there. The area was already set up, there had been a softener there previously when we purchased the house, however it was a rental unit and just don't believe in renting and couldn't afford our own softener, so we've dealt with seriously hard water pretty much the whole decade we've been in the house.
I'm so tired of crappy glasses, the hard water just coats our dishes. A chance to get away from that! WOOT!
So after a very long afternoon and evening with several trips for parts, really loud children fighting over a big box and pizza from Costco (cause we had not water to cook with!) it finally got installed. YAY!!!
The day wasn't a complete loss. I did pick a whole lot of apples, and had kids pick apples at Marja's old house. Not that I know when I'll get to make applesauce!!
Completely off topic, I'll throw in that you should always check your pre-schoolers hand before letting them get on the bus, especially if you shared mini Altoids earlier in the morning during a rough spot. Do this every single time, because the one time you don't your three year old will take the Altoids to school, clutched in his fist and when his teacher sees it, she just might have a mini heart attack thinking it's a pill, cause it does look like a pill.
Don't ask me how I know this.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Yeah I know
I keep switching stuff around on the page. Notice I made nice easy to read fonts, this change was made assuming everyone reads blogs when I do, in the middle of night. This was also done assuming everyone else also has hideously poor eye sight.
But when I feel like I have no control over my life, I have to have control over *exaggerated motion with my hands* something. Changing the font and the background is also fun.
Since Kent is sick and has gone to bed, leaving me to entertain myself, I think I'll share a post I wrote on my diaper board (cloth dipes, more natural living, lovely group of individuals).
Prayer is always included in major decisions. At the same time I believe that God gave us brains to think and expects us to use our heads, so even while praying, options need to be considered, we need to educate ourselves on our choices, we need to know the pros and cons before deciding.
I had some really rough social times as well. Middle school is brutal. Just brutal.
I have a certain amount of resolve that I want to teach my children to handle the bad stuff, because bad stuff happens in real life, cushioning kids, trying to alleviate disappointment, pain, sorrow and such does a great disservice to our children. They need to know how to cope and I hope I'm teaching them those coping skills.
At the same time, there's a point where the negatives just beat a kid down and while I want growing up to be realistic, I want to intervene long before any one of beautiful children loses their sense of self worth.
Jane could easily be beaten down. Easily. I see that clearly. That's why we're doing everything we can for her (and have for a number of years, like the six years of taekwondo) to help her grow into her potential. I see that potential and it's beautiful. She's immensely kind. She's fiercely loyal. She loves people. She shows concern for others even those she barely knows. She has an interest in art, a love for music, enjoys creating, enjoys making others smile.
In that awful age of "tween", her peers don't see these wonderful qualities. They only see the awkward girl that doesn't fit in. That laughs a little to loud, finds odd things funny, doesn't always follow the conversation.
*sigh*
I had a very strong impression when pregnant that this child would have challenges and honestly I wouldn't have ever put my finger that they'd be this non-descript and yet so painfully real.
Please note it starts off in the middle of a sentence, out of context because I've only included the information pertinent to my family. It was a discussion on switching schools for Jane, a suggestion given to us by her grandmother. It's not something I believe would be in Jane's best interest but the suggestion did evoke a lot of thought on my part on how to continue to help her.
Jane is currently reconnecting with a friend she's having over in the form of a sleepover. A sweet and gentle girl being raised in awful circumstances. We would never allow Jane to spend the night over there, so I was thrilled that she called to ask if she could come here.
In other Hill news, Ean spent the morning with my mother. Apparently he now knows the contents of her every closet. I cannot seem to get it drilled into his head that's it's not appropriate to snoop!! At least it was my mom, who has a sense of humor about his curious nature. Ean has also discovered the amazing technology known as a GPS. He drove around town with my mom using it, had to go to Kent's store to show his daddy. Pretty funny!
Ean's IEP had him getting special services into Kindergarten. They've realized really quickly that he is not resource room material. After a terrible morning yesterday of never finding his shoes (I'm almost prophetic in Wednesday night's posting) I went to his school with a new pair of shoes after a quick run to Walmart. He was being tested and the teacher said to me "He's really smart." Why yes, yes he is.
She looks at me "No REALLY, he's VERY smart." Apparently Ean was telling her that N O spells NO while O N spells ON. Keep in mind the child is only into his second month of Kindergarten. Oh my, the challenges with this one are so very different then the challenges I had with his sisters!
I don't know what the twins will do, it's to early to tell, we still have to many struggles with language. David I suspect will be more like Ean, just taking off in school. Greg has some more struggles. His comprehension is very poor right now and he still gets so frustrated when he thinks you don't understand him because you're telling him no on something. It's still very early in the year for Greg, there's plenty of time for him to do amazing things!
Kate, what can I say on Kate. Really who wants to know the world almost ended because she didn't get to play with a friend today? Seriously, I have got to figure out how to get the girl to talk in a regular voice without. the. whine. She's terrible about whining!!!! I've never allowed it, we've always stopped her and made her talk normal but she still does it! FRUSTRATING!!!
She's matured in so many other ways. However, this one issue, we're really going to have to ride her about it. I may go crazy otherwise!
So that's us, new format, new background, new font a little updating as well.
But when I feel like I have no control over my life, I have to have control over *exaggerated motion with my hands* something. Changing the font and the background is also fun.
Since Kent is sick and has gone to bed, leaving me to entertain myself, I think I'll share a post I wrote on my diaper board (cloth dipes, more natural living, lovely group of individuals).
Prayer is always included in major decisions. At the same time I believe that God gave us brains to think and expects us to use our heads, so even while praying, options need to be considered, we need to educate ourselves on our choices, we need to know the pros and cons before deciding.
I had some really rough social times as well. Middle school is brutal. Just brutal.
I have a certain amount of resolve that I want to teach my children to handle the bad stuff, because bad stuff happens in real life, cushioning kids, trying to alleviate disappointment, pain, sorrow and such does a great disservice to our children. They need to know how to cope and I hope I'm teaching them those coping skills.
At the same time, there's a point where the negatives just beat a kid down and while I want growing up to be realistic, I want to intervene long before any one of beautiful children loses their sense of self worth.
Jane could easily be beaten down. Easily. I see that clearly. That's why we're doing everything we can for her (and have for a number of years, like the six years of taekwondo) to help her grow into her potential. I see that potential and it's beautiful. She's immensely kind. She's fiercely loyal. She loves people. She shows concern for others even those she barely knows. She has an interest in art, a love for music, enjoys creating, enjoys making others smile.
In that awful age of "tween", her peers don't see these wonderful qualities. They only see the awkward girl that doesn't fit in. That laughs a little to loud, finds odd things funny, doesn't always follow the conversation.
*sigh*
I had a very strong impression when pregnant that this child would have challenges and honestly I wouldn't have ever put my finger that they'd be this non-descript and yet so painfully real.
Please note it starts off in the middle of a sentence, out of context because I've only included the information pertinent to my family. It was a discussion on switching schools for Jane, a suggestion given to us by her grandmother. It's not something I believe would be in Jane's best interest but the suggestion did evoke a lot of thought on my part on how to continue to help her.
Jane is currently reconnecting with a friend she's having over in the form of a sleepover. A sweet and gentle girl being raised in awful circumstances. We would never allow Jane to spend the night over there, so I was thrilled that she called to ask if she could come here.
In other Hill news, Ean spent the morning with my mother. Apparently he now knows the contents of her every closet. I cannot seem to get it drilled into his head that's it's not appropriate to snoop!! At least it was my mom, who has a sense of humor about his curious nature. Ean has also discovered the amazing technology known as a GPS. He drove around town with my mom using it, had to go to Kent's store to show his daddy. Pretty funny!
Ean's IEP had him getting special services into Kindergarten. They've realized really quickly that he is not resource room material. After a terrible morning yesterday of never finding his shoes (I'm almost prophetic in Wednesday night's posting) I went to his school with a new pair of shoes after a quick run to Walmart. He was being tested and the teacher said to me "He's really smart." Why yes, yes he is.
She looks at me "No REALLY, he's VERY smart." Apparently Ean was telling her that N O spells NO while O N spells ON. Keep in mind the child is only into his second month of Kindergarten. Oh my, the challenges with this one are so very different then the challenges I had with his sisters!
I don't know what the twins will do, it's to early to tell, we still have to many struggles with language. David I suspect will be more like Ean, just taking off in school. Greg has some more struggles. His comprehension is very poor right now and he still gets so frustrated when he thinks you don't understand him because you're telling him no on something. It's still very early in the year for Greg, there's plenty of time for him to do amazing things!
Kate, what can I say on Kate. Really who wants to know the world almost ended because she didn't get to play with a friend today? Seriously, I have got to figure out how to get the girl to talk in a regular voice without. the. whine. She's terrible about whining!!!! I've never allowed it, we've always stopped her and made her talk normal but she still does it! FRUSTRATING!!!
She's matured in so many other ways. However, this one issue, we're really going to have to ride her about it. I may go crazy otherwise!
So that's us, new format, new background, new font a little updating as well.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Questions I'd like to ask.
I work a part time job (janitorial) four nights a week, three of those nights are late so sometimes I come home and everyone is in bed soooooo family, some answers please.
Why is the dirty bowl (from tonights dinner) that had mashed potatoes whipped in on the dryer?
Even more puzzling, is there a reason there is a pair of dirty undies inside that bowl?
Why we're talking about misplaced items, is there a reason Ean's toothbrush is being stored on the kitchen counter?
Jane, when you went to the gym with Daphne when did raquetball and basketball turn into "hide and go seek" and the perrinal favorite "shut our friend in the gym locker" game?
Kate how was dinner?
Kate did you eat dinner?
Kate if you knew I put onion powder in the mashed potatoes, would that have decreased their ediblility? This of course is assuming you deemed them edible at all!
Ean did you put your shoes on the shoe rack?
How about near the shoe rack?
How about in the front room? Kitchen? Under your bed? Daddy's side of our bed? My side? Under my bed? Bathroom? Twinsroom? Backyard?????? Son, they're here somewhere!!
Oh yeah, I'll get to have *T*H*A*T* conversation with Ean in the morning before sending him off to school. I'm fairly certain that if I walked around my house I could find more puzzling things but I need to go to bed. Morning comes way to early, and I need my energy to find Ean's shoes.
Why is the dirty bowl (from tonights dinner) that had mashed potatoes whipped in on the dryer?
Even more puzzling, is there a reason there is a pair of dirty undies inside that bowl?
Why we're talking about misplaced items, is there a reason Ean's toothbrush is being stored on the kitchen counter?
Jane, when you went to the gym with Daphne when did raquetball and basketball turn into "hide and go seek" and the perrinal favorite "shut our friend in the gym locker" game?
Kate how was dinner?
Kate did you eat dinner?
Kate if you knew I put onion powder in the mashed potatoes, would that have decreased their ediblility? This of course is assuming you deemed them edible at all!
Ean did you put your shoes on the shoe rack?
How about near the shoe rack?
How about in the front room? Kitchen? Under your bed? Daddy's side of our bed? My side? Under my bed? Bathroom? Twinsroom? Backyard?????? Son, they're here somewhere!!
Oh yeah, I'll get to have *T*H*A*T* conversation with Ean in the morning before sending him off to school. I'm fairly certain that if I walked around my house I could find more puzzling things but I need to go to bed. Morning comes way to early, and I need my energy to find Ean's shoes.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
We're considering home schooling Jane
Not anyone else. The destructo genius boy and his whiney pink clad cohort would continue in public school. Those two need someone else to be the bad guy.
So far Kent and I have discussed this with each other and discussed this with Jane. I've also checked out resources and found a great online program that I believe Jane would enjoy that be an excellent supplement program to anything we did but no decision has been made yet. Of course there is nothing that says we have to make a decision quickly. More important is helping Jane understand that there is another option out there.
Last month when we started talking about homeschooling, i was thinking that we'd have to wait until she was in seventh grade. With Ean's rotating day schedule and the twins both in head start requiring a lot of volunteer time, I just couldn't see how we could pull off having her home this year. However I talked with my mom and she said she could help, either by providing her home like a "study hall" if Jane needed some quite time and I had one or three of the boys home or taking Ean so I could work with Jane.
It would be a huge help this year, if we decide to pull her. I couldn't even consider pulling her without knowing that kind of help would be available. Actually my mom said "that would be fun!" I love my mom!!!!
Jane's two biggest concerns are not having access to the school's library. Kent assured her that the library is an easy obsticle to overcome. He told her about he public library and we talked about taking regular trips (my children lose or destroy everything, so I am admittedly bad at the library right now) She asked if the public library has Harry Potter. Why yes Jane it does.
I admit to rolling my eyes when she asked, you see, I own the complete collection but she prefers to read the books from the Library, apparently the series is more fun if it's a library book!
Her other concern is friends, which Kent validated and then we talked about who she could get together with and when we could arrange play dates.
I think at this point it's best not to think in terms of are we going to or not but just provide Jane with support and love her as we help her through this difficult time.
So far Kent and I have discussed this with each other and discussed this with Jane. I've also checked out resources and found a great online program that I believe Jane would enjoy that be an excellent supplement program to anything we did but no decision has been made yet. Of course there is nothing that says we have to make a decision quickly. More important is helping Jane understand that there is another option out there.
Last month when we started talking about homeschooling, i was thinking that we'd have to wait until she was in seventh grade. With Ean's rotating day schedule and the twins both in head start requiring a lot of volunteer time, I just couldn't see how we could pull off having her home this year. However I talked with my mom and she said she could help, either by providing her home like a "study hall" if Jane needed some quite time and I had one or three of the boys home or taking Ean so I could work with Jane.
It would be a huge help this year, if we decide to pull her. I couldn't even consider pulling her without knowing that kind of help would be available. Actually my mom said "that would be fun!" I love my mom!!!!
Jane's two biggest concerns are not having access to the school's library. Kent assured her that the library is an easy obsticle to overcome. He told her about he public library and we talked about taking regular trips (my children lose or destroy everything, so I am admittedly bad at the library right now) She asked if the public library has Harry Potter. Why yes Jane it does.
I admit to rolling my eyes when she asked, you see, I own the complete collection but she prefers to read the books from the Library, apparently the series is more fun if it's a library book!
Her other concern is friends, which Kent validated and then we talked about who she could get together with and when we could arrange play dates.
I think at this point it's best not to think in terms of are we going to or not but just provide Jane with support and love her as we help her through this difficult time.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Growing pains
My eleven year old's best friend since first grade has declared she no longer wants to be Jane's friend.
Why are kids so mean?
Jane is the kindest, sweetest kid around and she's loyal. She will stand by her friends and support them through anything, that's just the kind of person she is. But she's not cool. She's socially awkward. She has a hard time staying in regular conversations. She's a little slow to figure out new things.
But where it counts, she's the best type of person imaginable.
I actually went over to talk to this girl. She was so closed down. She wouldn't look at me. I think she knows how incredibly crappy she's being to Jane. However Jane's been a friend of convenence for a while. She calls when she's bored, wants Jane to spend the night and then runs away from her so she doesn't have to walk home from school with her.
It's crappy all around.
I let this girl know that I was disappointed in her. I let her know that good friends are hard to come by. I don't know how much what I said sunk in, but I said a lot.
Then I had to talk to Jane, see this girls birthday is in a week and a half and Jane wants to buy her a present.
Bless my child's giving heart.
I told her that if she did indeed get a present for this girl it has to be without expectations. She would need to get something without expecting anything in return. Buying a present wouldn't make this girl be nice, wouldn't make them friends. I also told her that I wanted her to wait a week before deciding. If this girl was mean this week, she just might not want to do anything for her.
I brought up her good friends and told her that we could make sure that we remembered their birthdays.
I reminded Jane several times how to act around this girl. Be nice, be kind but don't stick around. Say hi, and then go about your business. I don't know how well my advice sunk in, Jane's so over eager at times but I tried. I suspect we'll have a lot of these talks over the coming years.
My hell it's been a hard day to be a mother. Girls are especially nasty and I remember sixth, seventh and eighth grade being particularly bad.
Why are kids so mean?
Jane is the kindest, sweetest kid around and she's loyal. She will stand by her friends and support them through anything, that's just the kind of person she is. But she's not cool. She's socially awkward. She has a hard time staying in regular conversations. She's a little slow to figure out new things.
But where it counts, she's the best type of person imaginable.
I actually went over to talk to this girl. She was so closed down. She wouldn't look at me. I think she knows how incredibly crappy she's being to Jane. However Jane's been a friend of convenence for a while. She calls when she's bored, wants Jane to spend the night and then runs away from her so she doesn't have to walk home from school with her.
It's crappy all around.
I let this girl know that I was disappointed in her. I let her know that good friends are hard to come by. I don't know how much what I said sunk in, but I said a lot.
Then I had to talk to Jane, see this girls birthday is in a week and a half and Jane wants to buy her a present.
Bless my child's giving heart.
I told her that if she did indeed get a present for this girl it has to be without expectations. She would need to get something without expecting anything in return. Buying a present wouldn't make this girl be nice, wouldn't make them friends. I also told her that I wanted her to wait a week before deciding. If this girl was mean this week, she just might not want to do anything for her.
I brought up her good friends and told her that we could make sure that we remembered their birthdays.
I reminded Jane several times how to act around this girl. Be nice, be kind but don't stick around. Say hi, and then go about your business. I don't know how well my advice sunk in, Jane's so over eager at times but I tried. I suspect we'll have a lot of these talks over the coming years.
My hell it's been a hard day to be a mother. Girls are especially nasty and I remember sixth, seventh and eighth grade being particularly bad.
Yeah, you're in the right place.
I changed the pictures to more recent stuff. Actually the yellowstone pictures at the side are all from our trip about 10 days ago, sooooooo pretty recent. The boys snoozing in the car may be almost a year old, I can't remember, but it's dang cute!
I was torn on keeping the mud picture of David up top. I mean really, nothing depicted our lives better then that picture. In the end I decided that we must evolve, and that includes blog pictures too.
So there you have it. The kids, a bit more recent. *smile*
I was torn on keeping the mud picture of David up top. I mean really, nothing depicted our lives better then that picture. In the end I decided that we must evolve, and that includes blog pictures too.
So there you have it. The kids, a bit more recent. *smile*
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Update on school for the kids.
We'll just go from top to bottom on this.
Jane-the sixth grader was moved to middle school as part of a plan by the school district to make room in over crowded elementary schools. Originally we were promised by the middle school that sixth graders would not be switching classes like the seventh and eighth graders. They would have a sixth grade curriculum. They would make it work.
Then the middle schools decided to do whatever they wanted and made schedules with class periods just like the upper grades. Throw in the four solid weeks we spent trying to track down who to get help from for this kid that has spent her entire school career in resource room. I felt like they were throwing her to the wolves with material that she'd never seen before, she still wasn't at grade level with.
I contacted her math teacher, explained she'd been a resource room kid and bless this wonderful teachers heart, she said she'd help her after school for 20 minutes or so when needed. It really was helping Jane. Also Jane had this fantastic science teacher that she adored and was having a blast in science.
Well the school figures out that they weren't fulfilling the states requirements for sixth graders, you know, the requirements the teachers would have done if the kids had been placed in regular classrooms instead of putting them in periods. Soooooo the school in it's infinite wisdom switched the sixth graders schedules. Four weeks into school Jane had new teachers, all new with the exception of one. Yes, that's ONE teacher. She's lost the science teacher she adored, the math teacher that was willing to help her after school.
SUCK!!!
Our good news, Jane is finally (long exaggerated sigh) getting help in the resource room.
Her report card, five A's, two C's and one F. The F is in homeroom, which is really a study hall type of class for the kids to do homework and stuff. I asked her how she got an F and she said she didn't know, so I told her she better ask so she can change that.
The C's are in science and math of course.
So that's Jane.
Now I just had parent teacher conference for Kate and surprise! Kate is a joy to have a class. Kate is a model student. Well, if we could get the girls reading up to grade and her spelling grade up, she'd be a model student!
She always tries, she takes part in discussions, she's a joy to be around (obviously this is because you don't have to fold laundry at school).
Kate does need to put in a bit more effort with her RA goals, she hasn't tried at all and heavens that girl has a 57% in spelling, so yes we must work on that but everything else is dynomite.
Ean Ean Ean. What to say on Ean. The standard for counting at the end of the school year is 31, Ean currently counts to 49. To be profficient in reading students must recognize 11 letters in a minute, Ean recognizes 17 in a minute but he knows all 26 capitals and 18 lower case letters.
Ean's biggest problem is blowing in his friends faces during circle time. Maturity is obviously a development that he's a little behind on. We'll have to work on it.
There's not much to say on the twins. They're loving head start, it does wear them out, see blog post on "Fred and George?" to fully appreciate their minds. Communication is getting better, we'll just keep working on it.
Not very exciting material but I wanted to document what the kids are doing in school.
Jane-the sixth grader was moved to middle school as part of a plan by the school district to make room in over crowded elementary schools. Originally we were promised by the middle school that sixth graders would not be switching classes like the seventh and eighth graders. They would have a sixth grade curriculum. They would make it work.
Then the middle schools decided to do whatever they wanted and made schedules with class periods just like the upper grades. Throw in the four solid weeks we spent trying to track down who to get help from for this kid that has spent her entire school career in resource room. I felt like they were throwing her to the wolves with material that she'd never seen before, she still wasn't at grade level with.
I contacted her math teacher, explained she'd been a resource room kid and bless this wonderful teachers heart, she said she'd help her after school for 20 minutes or so when needed. It really was helping Jane. Also Jane had this fantastic science teacher that she adored and was having a blast in science.
Well the school figures out that they weren't fulfilling the states requirements for sixth graders, you know, the requirements the teachers would have done if the kids had been placed in regular classrooms instead of putting them in periods. Soooooo the school in it's infinite wisdom switched the sixth graders schedules. Four weeks into school Jane had new teachers, all new with the exception of one. Yes, that's ONE teacher. She's lost the science teacher she adored, the math teacher that was willing to help her after school.
SUCK!!!
Our good news, Jane is finally (long exaggerated sigh) getting help in the resource room.
Her report card, five A's, two C's and one F. The F is in homeroom, which is really a study hall type of class for the kids to do homework and stuff. I asked her how she got an F and she said she didn't know, so I told her she better ask so she can change that.
The C's are in science and math of course.
So that's Jane.
Now I just had parent teacher conference for Kate and surprise! Kate is a joy to have a class. Kate is a model student. Well, if we could get the girls reading up to grade and her spelling grade up, she'd be a model student!
She always tries, she takes part in discussions, she's a joy to be around (obviously this is because you don't have to fold laundry at school).
Kate does need to put in a bit more effort with her RA goals, she hasn't tried at all and heavens that girl has a 57% in spelling, so yes we must work on that but everything else is dynomite.
Ean Ean Ean. What to say on Ean. The standard for counting at the end of the school year is 31, Ean currently counts to 49. To be profficient in reading students must recognize 11 letters in a minute, Ean recognizes 17 in a minute but he knows all 26 capitals and 18 lower case letters.
Ean's biggest problem is blowing in his friends faces during circle time. Maturity is obviously a development that he's a little behind on. We'll have to work on it.
There's not much to say on the twins. They're loving head start, it does wear them out, see blog post on "Fred and George?" to fully appreciate their minds. Communication is getting better, we'll just keep working on it.
Not very exciting material but I wanted to document what the kids are doing in school.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Fred and George?
Our son Ean has flaming red hair. From the moment he came out we swore his hair couldn't get any redder and. yet. it. did. So while pregnant with the twins we joked that if we had identical red headed twin boys we'd name then Fred and George, in reference to the magical identical jokesters in "Harry Potter", one of our most favorite book series.
At 19 weeks we confirmed they were boys and we knew they were identical, due to the specific pregnancy syndrome caused only by a shared placenta. Fred and George seemed destined to be.
Then they came out, in their red headed glory and really, we knew their names weren't Fred and George. Great joke that it was, these boys had different names, names chosen from deceased family members that we loved and respected. In retrospect we may have been wrong on their names. Really, maybe they should have been Fred and George.
The humor of these too is amazing. Even with the language delays, they manage to crack us up, often. On a recent trip to Yellowstone, we stopped along a river to watch a beautiful herd of elk just on the other side. The twins both admired the animals while Ean chose to be antisocial in the car. Eventually however Greg grew bored and "fell" down a slight slope.
He was very dramatic as he called for help. "OH NO, HELP ME" It was hysterical. Just when we thought the show wouldn't amount to much, David ran over "I HELP YOU GEG!!!" Dave then proceeded to lean forward and grab Greg's hand and he "saved" him!
Oh, I have picture proof.
So was saving your brother from a steep precipice enough drama when your a three year old red headed identical twin? Hardly!
The guys switched places on their head start teachers. What? Oh yes, they
switched places on their teachers.
You see, the guys go to different classes at head start. This is intentional, Greg's language delay is greater then his brothers and when together Greg doesn't talk as much because Dave talks for him. This does cause confusion when they're both in lunch and I've put them in the same shirts because their classmates see the twin and think someone was naughty and left.
Well a three year old mixing up the guys in the cafeteria while all the classes are having lunch is one thing. The twins trading backpacks on the bus, and then running to the wrong teachers during line up is another matter entirely.
And the teachers are busy, there are multiple buses with a few kids from every class on every bus. It's a little chaotic to say the least. So when the boys ran to the teachers, the teachers assumed they had the right kids plus both teachers looked at their backpacks to confirm they had the right kids. Little devils almost pulled it off but Greg's teacher said to Dave "HI Greg" and Dave looked up at her and smiled with his lips glued shut.
You see, Greg is missing a front tooth. He bumped it at about a year and it went bad and had to be pulled. We always tell people, use that missing tooth to be sure. David hiding his teeth so his teacher wouldn't see? A devious little detail I hadn't realized David had put together.
Who woulda thunk the three year old monkey knew that people could tell them apart from their smiles?????
Pam wasn't born yesterday, she knew from that tight lipped smile that it was David and that he was trying to pull a fast one on her. So Pam told Dawn (David's teacher) that the guys had switched places and the teachers switched them back.
I'd be impressed with any three year old identicals putting it together that they could switch but with the guys language delays, I'm completely bowled over! Holy cow, are we in trouble or what?
I am also highly amused.
Until they do it again, that is. :-)
At 19 weeks we confirmed they were boys and we knew they were identical, due to the specific pregnancy syndrome caused only by a shared placenta. Fred and George seemed destined to be.
Then they came out, in their red headed glory and really, we knew their names weren't Fred and George. Great joke that it was, these boys had different names, names chosen from deceased family members that we loved and respected. In retrospect we may have been wrong on their names. Really, maybe they should have been Fred and George.
The humor of these too is amazing. Even with the language delays, they manage to crack us up, often. On a recent trip to Yellowstone, we stopped along a river to watch a beautiful herd of elk just on the other side. The twins both admired the animals while Ean chose to be antisocial in the car. Eventually however Greg grew bored and "fell" down a slight slope.
He was very dramatic as he called for help. "OH NO, HELP ME" It was hysterical. Just when we thought the show wouldn't amount to much, David ran over "I HELP YOU GEG!!!" Dave then proceeded to lean forward and grab Greg's hand and he "saved" him!
Oh, I have picture proof.
So was saving your brother from a steep precipice enough drama when your a three year old red headed identical twin? Hardly!
The guys switched places on their head start teachers. What? Oh yes, they
switched places on their teachers.
You see, the guys go to different classes at head start. This is intentional, Greg's language delay is greater then his brothers and when together Greg doesn't talk as much because Dave talks for him. This does cause confusion when they're both in lunch and I've put them in the same shirts because their classmates see the twin and think someone was naughty and left.
Well a three year old mixing up the guys in the cafeteria while all the classes are having lunch is one thing. The twins trading backpacks on the bus, and then running to the wrong teachers during line up is another matter entirely.
And the teachers are busy, there are multiple buses with a few kids from every class on every bus. It's a little chaotic to say the least. So when the boys ran to the teachers, the teachers assumed they had the right kids plus both teachers looked at their backpacks to confirm they had the right kids. Little devils almost pulled it off but Greg's teacher said to Dave "HI Greg" and Dave looked up at her and smiled with his lips glued shut.
You see, Greg is missing a front tooth. He bumped it at about a year and it went bad and had to be pulled. We always tell people, use that missing tooth to be sure. David hiding his teeth so his teacher wouldn't see? A devious little detail I hadn't realized David had put together.
Who woulda thunk the three year old monkey knew that people could tell them apart from their smiles?????
Pam wasn't born yesterday, she knew from that tight lipped smile that it was David and that he was trying to pull a fast one on her. So Pam told Dawn (David's teacher) that the guys had switched places and the teachers switched them back.
I'd be impressed with any three year old identicals putting it together that they could switch but with the guys language delays, I'm completely bowled over! Holy cow, are we in trouble or what?
I am also highly amused.
Until they do it again, that is. :-)
Monday, July 27, 2009
I went shopping today.
School supplies you know, it's that time of year.
I didn't even bring a list, or try to find a list. I went to Office Max, Staples and Shopko and bought all their sales. You can't beat ten cents a pad of paper (limit 18) and ninety nine cents for crayola markers, water color paints, colored pencils, throw in a tub of erasures for twenty cents and glue for twenty five cents and more more more of the same, I think I made out pretty good.
My big splurge for the kids, not knowing what Jane will need makes it really hard to buy for her. With the sixth graders switch to jr. high, I really am at a loss at what she needs. The floor the sixth graders will occupy wasn't even cleared for them when school ended eight weeks ago. They weren't even sure how they would split the classes, change the workload, ect. So, I found a binder with a ton of pockets. For my disorganized girl, it just might be what she needs to oraganize her. We'll see.
I also bought something for myself. Shopko has cookware on sale at 50% off. I bought a set of Hard Anodized cookware. It's non-stick but without teflon. It's sturdy, really looks like it's made to last. I cannot begin to describe how excited I am. It's almost indecent. ;-)
Now, to train my family to take care of them!
I didn't even bring a list, or try to find a list. I went to Office Max, Staples and Shopko and bought all their sales. You can't beat ten cents a pad of paper (limit 18) and ninety nine cents for crayola markers, water color paints, colored pencils, throw in a tub of erasures for twenty cents and glue for twenty five cents and more more more of the same, I think I made out pretty good.
My big splurge for the kids, not knowing what Jane will need makes it really hard to buy for her. With the sixth graders switch to jr. high, I really am at a loss at what she needs. The floor the sixth graders will occupy wasn't even cleared for them when school ended eight weeks ago. They weren't even sure how they would split the classes, change the workload, ect. So, I found a binder with a ton of pockets. For my disorganized girl, it just might be what she needs to oraganize her. We'll see.
I also bought something for myself. Shopko has cookware on sale at 50% off. I bought a set of Hard Anodized cookware. It's non-stick but without teflon. It's sturdy, really looks like it's made to last. I cannot begin to describe how excited I am. It's almost indecent. ;-)
Now, to train my family to take care of them!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Oh gosh, how could I not mention Greg's fingers?????
Egads, what a nightmare!
Ever since David had gotton hurt, he's been mean, just mean to his twin. On a mission to make his twins life miserable, in whatever manner he could. Well he succeeded Sunday after church. Little **** slammed the door on his brothers hand. And the door latched.
Poor Greg was in so much pain, just so much pain all he could do was scream and kick his legs in frustration while flapping his injured hand. I thought he had broken his middle finger, it was an ugly maroon color, there was plenty of blood. Oh it was gruesome.
Conviently I had codiene on hand and knew the correct dosage for the little boy. It thankfully knocked him out allowing him to just relax. He really needed that.
He lost one nail completely and that finger was/is still a scabbed mess. The other nail is obviously damaged and he'll lose that nail too. We spent four solid days with little boys with bandaged fingers blowing through a rediculous amount of tubular gauze. Finally Thursday, after I got David's stitches off (I do amazing things when children sleep *laugh), I lifted the twins water ban. In celebration they swam the irrigation ditch at the park.
Not my idea of fun but then again I'm not a three year old deprived of water for a solid week.
I let them.
Hopefully we can enjoy the rest of the summer. Even if the cherries are gone, much to the twins dissapointment. :-)
Ever since David had gotton hurt, he's been mean, just mean to his twin. On a mission to make his twins life miserable, in whatever manner he could. Well he succeeded Sunday after church. Little **** slammed the door on his brothers hand. And the door latched.
Poor Greg was in so much pain, just so much pain all he could do was scream and kick his legs in frustration while flapping his injured hand. I thought he had broken his middle finger, it was an ugly maroon color, there was plenty of blood. Oh it was gruesome.
Conviently I had codiene on hand and knew the correct dosage for the little boy. It thankfully knocked him out allowing him to just relax. He really needed that.
He lost one nail completely and that finger was/is still a scabbed mess. The other nail is obviously damaged and he'll lose that nail too. We spent four solid days with little boys with bandaged fingers blowing through a rediculous amount of tubular gauze. Finally Thursday, after I got David's stitches off (I do amazing things when children sleep *laugh), I lifted the twins water ban. In celebration they swam the irrigation ditch at the park.
Not my idea of fun but then again I'm not a three year old deprived of water for a solid week.
I let them.
Hopefully we can enjoy the rest of the summer. Even if the cherries are gone, much to the twins dissapointment. :-)
Friday, July 17, 2009
Just a quick update
David got his wounds redressed. I could go into great detail about soaking his thumb and having to "help" the dressing off, but lets leave it at, there was blood when they were done.
The nurses felt so bad, they gave him enough stickers, they had a paperclip to keep them all together.
I'm suppose to keep it dry and bandaged until the stitches come out. I can't keep one boy dry and let the others get wet. I'm going to have really REALLY stinky boys.
On another note, Ean has a birthday party this afternoon. Boy, is he excited! lol
Also, the child is obsessed with pitting cherries. Really.
The nurses felt so bad, they gave him enough stickers, they had a paperclip to keep them all together.
I'm suppose to keep it dry and bandaged until the stitches come out. I can't keep one boy dry and let the others get wet. I'm going to have really REALLY stinky boys.
On another note, Ean has a birthday party this afternoon. Boy, is he excited! lol
Also, the child is obsessed with pitting cherries. Really.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Dave's no good, bad day
Yesterday.
Yesterday I got to experience that heart stopping adrenalin that we mom's dread. You know, the one that comes a split second after your child wails and you know something is dreadfully wrong.
Heaven knows my children wail a lot. Sometimes between Kate and Ean, my desire to plug my mp3 player into my ears and drown them out is enormous. But the wail I heard yesterday wasn't either one of them. It wasn't Jane nor was it Greg. It was my little Dave.
I know, I know, David and Greg are the same size but there's something about David, the tone of his voice, the way he moves, that just makes calling him "little Dave" seem natural. Blame my mom, she started it. *laugh*
I did say, six kids, didn't I? I had my niece Sarah on loan. We had invited her to the movies to see "Madagascar 2" with popcorn. Sarah's mom had dropped her off, my mom had arrived to come with us. After unlocking the suburban door, I started around to the other side, the twins seats are behind the driver, and middle, so that's where I buckle them. I made it to the very back of the car, so only two or three seconds from when I unlocked the door when the wail happened.
My mom yelled for me, and turned around and ran around the car. My mom was holding Davids wrist tightly, applying pressure. There was blood gushing. I grabbed the child and ran into the house and started the faucet. I couldn't even see where to apply pressure. I figured out quickly it was his thumb, took his hand out of the water, and mom handed me paper towels, we quickly soaked what we had and got new ones.
While trying to hold on the paper towels with a frantically crying boy at my feet, mom and I exchanged keys and I gave her the movie tickets. The movie was paid for, there was no reason for the other kids to not go and mom was a complete sport taking five children to the movies.
I got Ean's booster, safety out the window, I wasn't going to take the time to move a proper car seat. Conveniently there's an urgent care just outside our neighborhood, so I didn't have to go far. They got us right in and the nurse smeared Dave's thumb with numbing stuff.
He just sobbed, for a very long time.
Since it was a crushing injury (car door) the doctor ordered x-rays.
Three were taken and poor David just hated having to put his thumb down but he did really well. Very soon he figured out what was expected and when one of the shots needed to be redone, he held his hand very still with no prompting for the final x-ray.
It was confirmed that his bone was chipped. Once they started cleanup we realized he'd also lost his nail, both of these on top of a pretty ugly laceration. The Novocaine was the worst part, I had to hold him down for that but he was very cooperative once his thumb was numb. The laceration required three stitches. It runs almost the whole length of his thumb. The stitches look funny because the cut is jagged. It's actually not very big, but his thumb is so little, it looks much bigger then it is.
I requested Tylenol with codeine for the guy. He was being so brave but at the same time, the chipped bone, the lost nail along with the stitches, just makes you cringe. It makes me cringe!
Apparently codeine doesn't make David sleepy. He's got to be the only person in the world, but he was wired last night. Kent called me from work to let me know that he'd heard crying and noise from the bedroom. Worried about David's thumb, he opened the door. David was standing on Greg's chest jumping up and down.
We know the Codeine relieved pain, cause he was a stinker to his twin! Poor Greg!! His brother gets hurt and he suffers!
Tomorrow I take him in to change the dressing, we'll see if they say anything about the cherry stains on it. Actually I had to put it back on multiple times today, but it was still dry, so I didn't take him in. Hopefully it's all healing the way it should be.
All together now... POOR DAVID!!!!
Yesterday I got to experience that heart stopping adrenalin that we mom's dread. You know, the one that comes a split second after your child wails and you know something is dreadfully wrong.
Heaven knows my children wail a lot. Sometimes between Kate and Ean, my desire to plug my mp3 player into my ears and drown them out is enormous. But the wail I heard yesterday wasn't either one of them. It wasn't Jane nor was it Greg. It was my little Dave.
I know, I know, David and Greg are the same size but there's something about David, the tone of his voice, the way he moves, that just makes calling him "little Dave" seem natural. Blame my mom, she started it. *laugh*
I did say, six kids, didn't I? I had my niece Sarah on loan. We had invited her to the movies to see "Madagascar 2" with popcorn. Sarah's mom had dropped her off, my mom had arrived to come with us. After unlocking the suburban door, I started around to the other side, the twins seats are behind the driver, and middle, so that's where I buckle them. I made it to the very back of the car, so only two or three seconds from when I unlocked the door when the wail happened.
My mom yelled for me, and turned around and ran around the car. My mom was holding Davids wrist tightly, applying pressure. There was blood gushing. I grabbed the child and ran into the house and started the faucet. I couldn't even see where to apply pressure. I figured out quickly it was his thumb, took his hand out of the water, and mom handed me paper towels, we quickly soaked what we had and got new ones.
While trying to hold on the paper towels with a frantically crying boy at my feet, mom and I exchanged keys and I gave her the movie tickets. The movie was paid for, there was no reason for the other kids to not go and mom was a complete sport taking five children to the movies.
I got Ean's booster, safety out the window, I wasn't going to take the time to move a proper car seat. Conveniently there's an urgent care just outside our neighborhood, so I didn't have to go far. They got us right in and the nurse smeared Dave's thumb with numbing stuff.
He just sobbed, for a very long time.
Since it was a crushing injury (car door) the doctor ordered x-rays.
Three were taken and poor David just hated having to put his thumb down but he did really well. Very soon he figured out what was expected and when one of the shots needed to be redone, he held his hand very still with no prompting for the final x-ray.
It was confirmed that his bone was chipped. Once they started cleanup we realized he'd also lost his nail, both of these on top of a pretty ugly laceration. The Novocaine was the worst part, I had to hold him down for that but he was very cooperative once his thumb was numb. The laceration required three stitches. It runs almost the whole length of his thumb. The stitches look funny because the cut is jagged. It's actually not very big, but his thumb is so little, it looks much bigger then it is.
I requested Tylenol with codeine for the guy. He was being so brave but at the same time, the chipped bone, the lost nail along with the stitches, just makes you cringe. It makes me cringe!
Apparently codeine doesn't make David sleepy. He's got to be the only person in the world, but he was wired last night. Kent called me from work to let me know that he'd heard crying and noise from the bedroom. Worried about David's thumb, he opened the door. David was standing on Greg's chest jumping up and down.
We know the Codeine relieved pain, cause he was a stinker to his twin! Poor Greg!! His brother gets hurt and he suffers!
Tomorrow I take him in to change the dressing, we'll see if they say anything about the cherry stains on it. Actually I had to put it back on multiple times today, but it was still dry, so I didn't take him in. Hopefully it's all healing the way it should be.
All together now... POOR DAVID!!!!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Is it the kids or summer that makes life crazy?
Or maybe a good combination of both?
Really it's been never ending. Ean got spanked by the neighbor yesterday. He just let himself in and gave himself a tour of their house. Really, I'm confused, where on the world did he even think that was OK? He really struggles with boundaries, always in his siblings stuff, always in my stuff. In whatever he wants to and I'm not sure how to address it.
He's painted the bathroom sink with nail polish, painted the downstairs couch with nail polish, he's swiped every type of food he could from the kitchen and hidden it in his room. I mean multiple containers of yogurt, pancakes, oh gosh I don't know what all. This type of behavior you'd expect from a foster kid that thought he'd be starved but Ean? He's never been deprived. Sure we don't have treats every day and mama doesn't buy junk, but I bake goodies, we have Popsicles for the summer. It's not like they never have sugar, I personally think they still have way to much.
But it's not just food, he steals whatever catches his eye, whether or not he knows what it actually is. I had one perfume that I liked and occasionally lightly used. One. One. Normally perfume bothers my allergies but this was a very light scent that I could get away with. Haiku Awakenings from Avon. I got it oh, maybe five or six years ago. Yeah, it's gone. My son used it all. My son......
There's dangerous stuff too. He's swiping meds. I had to tell him over and over that medication will make you so sick you'll go to the hospital, it could kill you. I made him cry. But if my words aren't strong, he completely blows me off? How do I deal with that?
The kids had swim lessons last month, a friend told me I could split up a private lesson, I asked one of the teachers, he said, yes you could. I asked again, he said yes you could. I said really? I can take all the kids, pay for a half hour and get them all in? He said sure you can, I'll do it.
SO the kids had one private lesson, the neighbor doesn't know how to swim, I arranged for her to come along and for two teachers. The other teacher was prepared to go for an hour an half with each kid having their own half hour. Said I could go shorter but I'd have to pay for each. child. no. matter. what.
Wait.
That doesn't compute.
It's not like I didn't ask five or six times, check and double check. And if I'm willing to pay for their time, why shouldn't I have a say in how that time is used? It makes them more money in the end because I can't afford to pay for each child. I was more then a bit frustrated, so Kent and I are going to take the kids swimming Saturday, see how much work we can do on our own.
I wish I had access to a private pool. There's a woman that taught the girls, she was awesome. So incredibly good. I'd love for her to teach them but she's not affiliated with the gym anymore. *sigh*
Lets see, what else. Oh the forth! I ended up with an abscessed tooth and a sprained ankle. The kids had a great time. I ended up on the phone with the dentist's office at the parade getting a stronger prescription of antibiotics. That was Saturday, when I went into the dentist on Monday, I found out there was no hope for that tooth, it was pulled.
That's the third tooth I've had pulled and I'm not even forty yet. I'm kissing forty, but I'm not forty yet.
I know in my head my teeth do not reflect what I'm worth as a person but I still feel like less of a person. While getting numbed, I had tears just rolling down my face. It's humbling. It's embarrassing.
To top it all off is the question of money. We can't afford the dental work and I feel so damn guilty for causing more stress on our already stretched to the hilt finances.
It doesn't help that I could have used something heavier then the Tylenol and ibuprofen I was taking the first couple of days but I didn't dare with a kid in the house that I know (somehow) swiped meds. We have locks on everything, and he still manages to get in.
ARG!
Kate is being the laziest butt this summer, not responding to me over and over again.
I don't know, I'm frustrated.
Really it's been never ending. Ean got spanked by the neighbor yesterday. He just let himself in and gave himself a tour of their house. Really, I'm confused, where on the world did he even think that was OK? He really struggles with boundaries, always in his siblings stuff, always in my stuff. In whatever he wants to and I'm not sure how to address it.
He's painted the bathroom sink with nail polish, painted the downstairs couch with nail polish, he's swiped every type of food he could from the kitchen and hidden it in his room. I mean multiple containers of yogurt, pancakes, oh gosh I don't know what all. This type of behavior you'd expect from a foster kid that thought he'd be starved but Ean? He's never been deprived. Sure we don't have treats every day and mama doesn't buy junk, but I bake goodies, we have Popsicles for the summer. It's not like they never have sugar, I personally think they still have way to much.
But it's not just food, he steals whatever catches his eye, whether or not he knows what it actually is. I had one perfume that I liked and occasionally lightly used. One. One. Normally perfume bothers my allergies but this was a very light scent that I could get away with. Haiku Awakenings from Avon. I got it oh, maybe five or six years ago. Yeah, it's gone. My son used it all. My son......
There's dangerous stuff too. He's swiping meds. I had to tell him over and over that medication will make you so sick you'll go to the hospital, it could kill you. I made him cry. But if my words aren't strong, he completely blows me off? How do I deal with that?
The kids had swim lessons last month, a friend told me I could split up a private lesson, I asked one of the teachers, he said, yes you could. I asked again, he said yes you could. I said really? I can take all the kids, pay for a half hour and get them all in? He said sure you can, I'll do it.
SO the kids had one private lesson, the neighbor doesn't know how to swim, I arranged for her to come along and for two teachers. The other teacher was prepared to go for an hour an half with each kid having their own half hour. Said I could go shorter but I'd have to pay for each. child. no. matter. what.
Wait.
That doesn't compute.
It's not like I didn't ask five or six times, check and double check. And if I'm willing to pay for their time, why shouldn't I have a say in how that time is used? It makes them more money in the end because I can't afford to pay for each child. I was more then a bit frustrated, so Kent and I are going to take the kids swimming Saturday, see how much work we can do on our own.
I wish I had access to a private pool. There's a woman that taught the girls, she was awesome. So incredibly good. I'd love for her to teach them but she's not affiliated with the gym anymore. *sigh*
Lets see, what else. Oh the forth! I ended up with an abscessed tooth and a sprained ankle. The kids had a great time. I ended up on the phone with the dentist's office at the parade getting a stronger prescription of antibiotics. That was Saturday, when I went into the dentist on Monday, I found out there was no hope for that tooth, it was pulled.
That's the third tooth I've had pulled and I'm not even forty yet. I'm kissing forty, but I'm not forty yet.
I know in my head my teeth do not reflect what I'm worth as a person but I still feel like less of a person. While getting numbed, I had tears just rolling down my face. It's humbling. It's embarrassing.
To top it all off is the question of money. We can't afford the dental work and I feel so damn guilty for causing more stress on our already stretched to the hilt finances.
It doesn't help that I could have used something heavier then the Tylenol and ibuprofen I was taking the first couple of days but I didn't dare with a kid in the house that I know (somehow) swiped meds. We have locks on everything, and he still manages to get in.
ARG!
Kate is being the laziest butt this summer, not responding to me over and over again.
I don't know, I'm frustrated.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Alright already, get off my case!!!
Yes I realize I've sorely neglected my blog. It's bad enough to get nagged by my husband but sheesh, Internet friends that I've never met in real life make a point of mentioning I need a new entry, I get the point already!!!
Summer is almost here. The kids are so excited. I however am a teensy bit terrified. Five children, long summer days, no.breaks.whatsoever. Why oh why would that make me nervous? *smile*
Some things that will make it easier, the twins have gained some GREAT language skills. They're still very delayed, they'll go to early intervention next year with the same teachers they had winter semester, so that's all good. Having them hit their third birthday and still not having any real language skills was very hard emotionally for me. It's frustrating for me, for them, for everyone. Greg had resorted to banging his head on the ground out of sheer frustration from no being able to tell me what he wanted. It was a difficult period and we're not out of the woods yet. Conversations about food are OK, like color, yummy, and such. Trains are always good for a conversation. Family, siblings all that is good but if you go to far out of that realm, they easily lose you.
Also, when I say conversation, I mean repeat the same half dozen sentences over and over again.
Harder stuff for summer, we're tackling the potty! We have a very sordid history of potty training so I'll save the enthusiasm. I don't know how ready they are but for my own sanity, *I* need them to use the potty. Heaven knows our budget could sure use the boost of not buying diapers.
The biggest news around here, the absolute biggest news, my mom
*wait for it*
My mom bought a house and moved to Pocatello.
Yes, forty years after leaving she's come back. My brother Malcolm wants to know how I twisted her arm, which I find just hysterical since she made the decision before she ever even told me!!!
OK, backtrack. In March she came out for Kate's baptism. She also went house hunting. I made a joke the week before about buying the neighbors house and she looked it up on the Internet and said it was to expensive, she'd have to hunt when she came out.
My jaw hit the floor.
For my entire life she's swore up and down she'd never live in Idaho again. NEVER. That's all I've heard. But she's been lonely and she realized while visiting Malcolm in Japan that the distance has put a huge wedge in her relationship with her grandchildren. She also realized after having close friendships during her mission, she was lonely in Vermont. So she came out and bought a house.
My older brother will be moved out here eventually but there's a lot of red tape to cut through first. He's in the system in Vermont, and all his information has to be approved by Idaho health and welfare to get him in the Idaho system. Then they can decide how to best place him and there's probably a waiting list for a group home or group/supervised apartment.
Really it was a leap of faith.
Mom's Vermont house needs to sell fast so she pay off the mortgage on the Idaho house. There's one lady that keeps coming back but has serious misgivings about the basement and sump pump (it was built next to a lake). *eye roll* Buy it or not but it is what it is, a house with a sump pump.
I'm still working. Kent's still working. We're all working except the kids who think they have some kind of special exemption from chores. Uh, yeah, it's going to be a long summer if that's what they think cause they are wrong!
We're working on our garden, building a built up bed for raspberries, since the one's we planted a few years ago left our yard for greener pastures in the neighbor's yard who apparently is much better at watering.
Traitors.
We're also down a pine tree, it died so we have a whole new corner of the yard to try to build another garden spot. The grapes are all growing, the established vine came back of course and the two new vines are both coming back. The three year old saplings survived the winter and I've spent the past two weeks plucking off flowers, much to children's dismay. I keep explaining, we want the little trees to grow roots not fruit but they still don't understand.
We're going to be replacing the apricot with something not as finicky. It's required way to much maintenance and it attracts earwigs. *shudder* The Cherry out front has been so much nicer, aphids are quickly taken care of with diluted dish detergent and if we wrap the tree, there's plenty of cherries for us and the birds.
I think I started off with dealing with kids during the summer. Swim lessons should help. Although Ean's already announced he doesn't know how to swim so he can't have swim lessons! He's decided since this morning maybe it won't be so bad. The twins will have lessons too although the expense of five kiddos in lessons, yuck!
We're also doing the weekly movie. Can't beat the price and it's a nice treat during the hot summer months. My mom will go with us too. Of course we have summer lunches starting January first. That will help the kids burn off steam as well.
I need to take out stock in sunscreen this summer. I've already bought a good $30 worth of sunscreen for those red headed boys that just fry. It'll be a battle for sure.
So there you go, a blog entry. I don't want anymore complaints ya'all. *sticks out tongue*
Summer is almost here. The kids are so excited. I however am a teensy bit terrified. Five children, long summer days, no.breaks.whatsoever. Why oh why would that make me nervous? *smile*
Some things that will make it easier, the twins have gained some GREAT language skills. They're still very delayed, they'll go to early intervention next year with the same teachers they had winter semester, so that's all good. Having them hit their third birthday and still not having any real language skills was very hard emotionally for me. It's frustrating for me, for them, for everyone. Greg had resorted to banging his head on the ground out of sheer frustration from no being able to tell me what he wanted. It was a difficult period and we're not out of the woods yet. Conversations about food are OK, like color, yummy, and such. Trains are always good for a conversation. Family, siblings all that is good but if you go to far out of that realm, they easily lose you.
Also, when I say conversation, I mean repeat the same half dozen sentences over and over again.
Harder stuff for summer, we're tackling the potty! We have a very sordid history of potty training so I'll save the enthusiasm. I don't know how ready they are but for my own sanity, *I* need them to use the potty. Heaven knows our budget could sure use the boost of not buying diapers.
The biggest news around here, the absolute biggest news, my mom
*wait for it*
My mom bought a house and moved to Pocatello.
Yes, forty years after leaving she's come back. My brother Malcolm wants to know how I twisted her arm, which I find just hysterical since she made the decision before she ever even told me!!!
OK, backtrack. In March she came out for Kate's baptism. She also went house hunting. I made a joke the week before about buying the neighbors house and she looked it up on the Internet and said it was to expensive, she'd have to hunt when she came out.
My jaw hit the floor.
For my entire life she's swore up and down she'd never live in Idaho again. NEVER. That's all I've heard. But she's been lonely and she realized while visiting Malcolm in Japan that the distance has put a huge wedge in her relationship with her grandchildren. She also realized after having close friendships during her mission, she was lonely in Vermont. So she came out and bought a house.
My older brother will be moved out here eventually but there's a lot of red tape to cut through first. He's in the system in Vermont, and all his information has to be approved by Idaho health and welfare to get him in the Idaho system. Then they can decide how to best place him and there's probably a waiting list for a group home or group/supervised apartment.
Really it was a leap of faith.
Mom's Vermont house needs to sell fast so she pay off the mortgage on the Idaho house. There's one lady that keeps coming back but has serious misgivings about the basement and sump pump (it was built next to a lake). *eye roll* Buy it or not but it is what it is, a house with a sump pump.
I'm still working. Kent's still working. We're all working except the kids who think they have some kind of special exemption from chores. Uh, yeah, it's going to be a long summer if that's what they think cause they are wrong!
We're working on our garden, building a built up bed for raspberries, since the one's we planted a few years ago left our yard for greener pastures in the neighbor's yard who apparently is much better at watering.
Traitors.
We're also down a pine tree, it died so we have a whole new corner of the yard to try to build another garden spot. The grapes are all growing, the established vine came back of course and the two new vines are both coming back. The three year old saplings survived the winter and I've spent the past two weeks plucking off flowers, much to children's dismay. I keep explaining, we want the little trees to grow roots not fruit but they still don't understand.
We're going to be replacing the apricot with something not as finicky. It's required way to much maintenance and it attracts earwigs. *shudder* The Cherry out front has been so much nicer, aphids are quickly taken care of with diluted dish detergent and if we wrap the tree, there's plenty of cherries for us and the birds.
I think I started off with dealing with kids during the summer. Swim lessons should help. Although Ean's already announced he doesn't know how to swim so he can't have swim lessons! He's decided since this morning maybe it won't be so bad. The twins will have lessons too although the expense of five kiddos in lessons, yuck!
We're also doing the weekly movie. Can't beat the price and it's a nice treat during the hot summer months. My mom will go with us too. Of course we have summer lunches starting January first. That will help the kids burn off steam as well.
I need to take out stock in sunscreen this summer. I've already bought a good $30 worth of sunscreen for those red headed boys that just fry. It'll be a battle for sure.
So there you go, a blog entry. I don't want anymore complaints ya'all. *sticks out tongue*
Friday, January 2, 2009
I remember the day I met Kent.
I had escaped Provo for the weekend to visit family in Idaho. Pocatello to be exact. I was spending the night at my aunt and uncles, specifically I was going to check on/visit my grandfather, still grieving my grandmothers death from the month before.
I had no idea while packing that I'd meet someone so special. My grandfather was a chain smoker, so I always packed a weeks worth of clothes for the weekend to change out of smokey stuff and yet I managed to not put a single date worthy outfit in my suitcase. That would be fate because as soon as I saw my aunt, she just knew she had the perfect guy to set me up with. She asked if I would object to being set up, I figured I had nothing to lose, so my aunt called Pat.
Pat is the mom, my now mother in law. See, Kent still lived at home, at age 24, in the basement. Oh he paid rent, he worked, went to church, he just happened to live at home. Well ok, he was a bit of a mamas boy but when we met, he was so mesmerized by my good looks and personality, he cut the apron strings as soon as he said good night on that first date.
Pat went to ask Kent how he felt about a date and Kent, figuring he had a *cough* year long dry spell, thought going out with a girl might not be such a bad idea. Kent called my aunts house to officially ask me out.
That phone call was weird. Not because I was being asked out on a date, but because Kent's voice was eerily similar to an old flames. While dating, I had to pause for a few seconds and listen hard to figure out who I was talking to. ANYWAY, the man asked me out for Mexican and a movie, actually The Lion King. I didn't mention that Mexican wasn't my favorite and hung up the phone realizing I literally had nothing, I mean nothing to wear on a date. I had my weekend slouch clothes, half of which were in a garbage bag reeking of cigarette smoke from visiting my grandpa.
I managed to find a clean sweatshirt without holes and jeans that were only mildly worn in the knees. I did have my make-up and curling iron and went to town. I spent an hour putting myself to together. When we talked in later years, Kent recalled that I took his breath away when I answered the door but he had no idea that I'd worked so hard on my hair or my face.
Right before he came my aunt panicked, starting mumbling out loud that she didn't' really know him and what if he was a serial killer???!!!!! When Kent drove up with his rig, outfitted with half a dozen cellular antennas and HAM radio antennas, Nancy's face immediately brightened as she announced that if I disappeared, at least his vehicle would be easy to describe to the police. I rolled my eyes as I reminded her that this was her idea.
The doorbell rang.
I answered the door and there stood a man, blond, straight hair, receding hairline, glasses. I can't say I was blown away but he gave off a very nice vibe, sincere, kind, genuine. I remember smiling shyly and then he spoke, and I felt so at ease with him. We started talking about missions and conversation never stopped. We didn't have awkward pauses, it wasn't like we'd just met, it was like we were old friends.
Our second date, Kent confided to me that he had been always painfully shy around women. Dating was a challenge, he never knew what to say. Actually everyone told me how quiet he was. Never spoke unless he was with friends and as our relationship progressed it was assumed that *I* did all the talking. This wasn't the case. It wasn't the case at all. Kent told me that just a few days before he had prayed, prayed that when he met the right woman, he'd know because he'd be able to talk to her.
See, I never met the shy man. From the moment we met, he was at ease with me. He was soft spoken yet energetic. He sold cell phones, volunteered for the local Search and Rescue, served an LDS mission in Jacksonville Florida. *smile* We started talking about missions, sci-fi, families, fathers, just everything. It was all so natural. I had the distinct impression that this was someone I could marry. I knew our personalities, goals and desires were compatible. Of course, I thought he was enjoying our date but I didn't know if he felt the same way that I did.
It wasn't until years later that I found out that Kent was determined to marry someone that loved Mexican, so he always took dates out for Mexican, if they didn't like it, then he wouldn't take them out again. I tease him sometimes on missing out on me if I'd spoken up. *laugh* Seriously, out of all the things to look at in a spouse, this one point was non-negotiable for him. Lucky for him I'm polite, he would have missed out all for the love of Mexican food.
We went to the movies after dinner. Really, movies are such an awful place to take a date, especially a first date. You can't snuggle, hold hands, you just sit in the dark next to each other. Luckily I had already seen the movie, oh the previous weekend because I had trouble paying attention. I kept thinking about dinner, replaying our conversation in my head. It had been a very long time since I'd gone on such a nice date. I wouldn't say it was "magical" or even "perfect" but it was fun, lots of fun and I craved to just go out and have a good time on a date. No expectations, just relax and have a good time. That's what happened. It was exactly what I needed.
After taking me home, we had a few awkward moments at the doorstep. No kisses, but neither one of us knew what to do, since it was the only awkward moment of the night, it was easily moved past I think. There was a quick squeeze and then Kent asked me to go to church with him the next day, at his singles ward.
You have to understand the typical Latter Day Saint Singles ward to understand what an incredibly bold move this was for him to make. To bring a single woman to church with him is rumor mill fodder and dating death because you're labeled as taken and written off. Singles wards can be cruel but I don't' think the man cared. He just wanted to spend time with me. And I wasn't about to say no.
The next day it was easy to get doled up. I of course had brought church clothes. Re-did hair and make-up, not realizing that I shouldn't have gone to all the trouble, he didn't notice anyway. We said goodbye after church and my heart beat a little faster every time I thought of him.
I opted to spend the night again at my aunts and drive back to school in the morning at four am. Yes I was a little crazy, yes I made it and as soon as I was at my apartment I woke up my roommate to tell her about my date. I was bursting with excitement to tell *exasperated hand gesture* someone about my date. She laughed at me, as I giggled like a school girl.
I didn't hear from Kent for another two weeks. I thought about him but I didn't hear from him. Well, I had moved apartments about a month before and *laugh* sorta forgot to give my family my new phone number. So Kent called my aunt in Pocatello, got a number it didn't work. Called my aunt in Salt Lake, she didn't have my new number either. He got my parents number in Vermont, called and got my brother Malcolm who helpfully supplied that he didn't care what my new phone number was. The man called all over the US trying to find out how to reach me.
He finally resorted to calling my job. I was teaching Swedish at the MTC (Missionary Training Center), as one of six teachers, it was pretty easy to track me down. He actually called the MTC, left a message that made it's way to my supervisor and I got it that night. Oh my, I got the message at the start of my shift and I was very distracted during my shift.
I will admit that as far as being a teacher goes, I was a mediocre teacher at best however the Lord works in mysterious ways and when I was called and asked if I wanted to interview (they were desperate for a Swedish teacher), I received a very strong impression that I was being given that job for a reason. I struggled and really had to exercise some serious faith to help do what I struggled with. I
found myself feeling very close to the Lord which I think helped me be where I needed to be to recognize Kent's worth.
I called Kent and we arranged to meet in Salt Lake the next day. While visiting and walking together, at one point our hands swung and touched, next thing we were holding hands. The sparks just flew. Kent swears up and down that I grabbed his hand but that's not what happened. And he enjoyed it as much as I did. *laugh*
We had a dumb little thing we did as roommates where if you held hands you owed everyone m&m's, if you kissed you owed everyone ice cream. I bought m&m's on the way home and threw them at my roommates. I was so excited.
Now that Kent had my phone number we were able to talk and we did, daily, for hours. My roommates loved me. Well, I don't think I was to bad because we talked late at night and I always surrendered the phone at the drop of a hat. Kent came down a month later, we officially had known each other six weeks and had gone on three dates. We went up the canyon and stood under bridal veil falls watching the water. It was fall and it was closed so we were just past the parking lot but we were alone and we snuggled and talked.
Finally Kent held me tight and told me that he'd understand if I needed time but he knew he wanted to marry me, to spend eternity with me. I looked up into his beautiful eyes and told him that I already knew it was right and said we probably should get a ring then.
I freaked out my roommates, my best friend especially. One roommate was sure for the next couple of weeks I was playing an elaborate joke because surely I wasn't really getting married. Most of my roommates knew I was serious. My best friend was sure I'd gone off the deep end.
I was one hundred percent at peace with my decision to marry Kent. If I had any doubts, was nervous even, felt any negative feelings in the least, I could not have married him.
I dated a man on and off for five years before Kent. Whenever marriage came up, I was a wreck, an absolutely wreck. It felt wrong, it was a relief to put it on the back burner. With Kent, complete opposite. I was so at peace. I knew it was right. Kent did too, although Kent did have a major panic attack the day after he proposed, poor guy.
We had a very short six week engagement and married exactly three months after we met. So much joy, so much happiness in holding the hand of my sweetheart while making promises to God and to each other.
And to think, it all started with a blind date.
I had no idea while packing that I'd meet someone so special. My grandfather was a chain smoker, so I always packed a weeks worth of clothes for the weekend to change out of smokey stuff and yet I managed to not put a single date worthy outfit in my suitcase. That would be fate because as soon as I saw my aunt, she just knew she had the perfect guy to set me up with. She asked if I would object to being set up, I figured I had nothing to lose, so my aunt called Pat.
Pat is the mom, my now mother in law. See, Kent still lived at home, at age 24, in the basement. Oh he paid rent, he worked, went to church, he just happened to live at home. Well ok, he was a bit of a mamas boy but when we met, he was so mesmerized by my good looks and personality, he cut the apron strings as soon as he said good night on that first date.
Pat went to ask Kent how he felt about a date and Kent, figuring he had a *cough* year long dry spell, thought going out with a girl might not be such a bad idea. Kent called my aunts house to officially ask me out.
That phone call was weird. Not because I was being asked out on a date, but because Kent's voice was eerily similar to an old flames. While dating, I had to pause for a few seconds and listen hard to figure out who I was talking to. ANYWAY, the man asked me out for Mexican and a movie, actually The Lion King. I didn't mention that Mexican wasn't my favorite and hung up the phone realizing I literally had nothing, I mean nothing to wear on a date. I had my weekend slouch clothes, half of which were in a garbage bag reeking of cigarette smoke from visiting my grandpa.
I managed to find a clean sweatshirt without holes and jeans that were only mildly worn in the knees. I did have my make-up and curling iron and went to town. I spent an hour putting myself to together. When we talked in later years, Kent recalled that I took his breath away when I answered the door but he had no idea that I'd worked so hard on my hair or my face.
Right before he came my aunt panicked, starting mumbling out loud that she didn't' really know him and what if he was a serial killer???!!!!! When Kent drove up with his rig, outfitted with half a dozen cellular antennas and HAM radio antennas, Nancy's face immediately brightened as she announced that if I disappeared, at least his vehicle would be easy to describe to the police. I rolled my eyes as I reminded her that this was her idea.
The doorbell rang.
I answered the door and there stood a man, blond, straight hair, receding hairline, glasses. I can't say I was blown away but he gave off a very nice vibe, sincere, kind, genuine. I remember smiling shyly and then he spoke, and I felt so at ease with him. We started talking about missions and conversation never stopped. We didn't have awkward pauses, it wasn't like we'd just met, it was like we were old friends.
Our second date, Kent confided to me that he had been always painfully shy around women. Dating was a challenge, he never knew what to say. Actually everyone told me how quiet he was. Never spoke unless he was with friends and as our relationship progressed it was assumed that *I* did all the talking. This wasn't the case. It wasn't the case at all. Kent told me that just a few days before he had prayed, prayed that when he met the right woman, he'd know because he'd be able to talk to her.
See, I never met the shy man. From the moment we met, he was at ease with me. He was soft spoken yet energetic. He sold cell phones, volunteered for the local Search and Rescue, served an LDS mission in Jacksonville Florida. *smile* We started talking about missions, sci-fi, families, fathers, just everything. It was all so natural. I had the distinct impression that this was someone I could marry. I knew our personalities, goals and desires were compatible. Of course, I thought he was enjoying our date but I didn't know if he felt the same way that I did.
It wasn't until years later that I found out that Kent was determined to marry someone that loved Mexican, so he always took dates out for Mexican, if they didn't like it, then he wouldn't take them out again. I tease him sometimes on missing out on me if I'd spoken up. *laugh* Seriously, out of all the things to look at in a spouse, this one point was non-negotiable for him. Lucky for him I'm polite, he would have missed out all for the love of Mexican food.
We went to the movies after dinner. Really, movies are such an awful place to take a date, especially a first date. You can't snuggle, hold hands, you just sit in the dark next to each other. Luckily I had already seen the movie, oh the previous weekend because I had trouble paying attention. I kept thinking about dinner, replaying our conversation in my head. It had been a very long time since I'd gone on such a nice date. I wouldn't say it was "magical" or even "perfect" but it was fun, lots of fun and I craved to just go out and have a good time on a date. No expectations, just relax and have a good time. That's what happened. It was exactly what I needed.
After taking me home, we had a few awkward moments at the doorstep. No kisses, but neither one of us knew what to do, since it was the only awkward moment of the night, it was easily moved past I think. There was a quick squeeze and then Kent asked me to go to church with him the next day, at his singles ward.
You have to understand the typical Latter Day Saint Singles ward to understand what an incredibly bold move this was for him to make. To bring a single woman to church with him is rumor mill fodder and dating death because you're labeled as taken and written off. Singles wards can be cruel but I don't' think the man cared. He just wanted to spend time with me. And I wasn't about to say no.
The next day it was easy to get doled up. I of course had brought church clothes. Re-did hair and make-up, not realizing that I shouldn't have gone to all the trouble, he didn't notice anyway. We said goodbye after church and my heart beat a little faster every time I thought of him.
I opted to spend the night again at my aunts and drive back to school in the morning at four am. Yes I was a little crazy, yes I made it and as soon as I was at my apartment I woke up my roommate to tell her about my date. I was bursting with excitement to tell *exasperated hand gesture* someone about my date. She laughed at me, as I giggled like a school girl.
I didn't hear from Kent for another two weeks. I thought about him but I didn't hear from him. Well, I had moved apartments about a month before and *laugh* sorta forgot to give my family my new phone number. So Kent called my aunt in Pocatello, got a number it didn't work. Called my aunt in Salt Lake, she didn't have my new number either. He got my parents number in Vermont, called and got my brother Malcolm who helpfully supplied that he didn't care what my new phone number was. The man called all over the US trying to find out how to reach me.
He finally resorted to calling my job. I was teaching Swedish at the MTC (Missionary Training Center), as one of six teachers, it was pretty easy to track me down. He actually called the MTC, left a message that made it's way to my supervisor and I got it that night. Oh my, I got the message at the start of my shift and I was very distracted during my shift.
I will admit that as far as being a teacher goes, I was a mediocre teacher at best however the Lord works in mysterious ways and when I was called and asked if I wanted to interview (they were desperate for a Swedish teacher), I received a very strong impression that I was being given that job for a reason. I struggled and really had to exercise some serious faith to help do what I struggled with. I
found myself feeling very close to the Lord which I think helped me be where I needed to be to recognize Kent's worth.
I called Kent and we arranged to meet in Salt Lake the next day. While visiting and walking together, at one point our hands swung and touched, next thing we were holding hands. The sparks just flew. Kent swears up and down that I grabbed his hand but that's not what happened. And he enjoyed it as much as I did. *laugh*
We had a dumb little thing we did as roommates where if you held hands you owed everyone m&m's, if you kissed you owed everyone ice cream. I bought m&m's on the way home and threw them at my roommates. I was so excited.
Now that Kent had my phone number we were able to talk and we did, daily, for hours. My roommates loved me. Well, I don't think I was to bad because we talked late at night and I always surrendered the phone at the drop of a hat. Kent came down a month later, we officially had known each other six weeks and had gone on three dates. We went up the canyon and stood under bridal veil falls watching the water. It was fall and it was closed so we were just past the parking lot but we were alone and we snuggled and talked.
Finally Kent held me tight and told me that he'd understand if I needed time but he knew he wanted to marry me, to spend eternity with me. I looked up into his beautiful eyes and told him that I already knew it was right and said we probably should get a ring then.
I freaked out my roommates, my best friend especially. One roommate was sure for the next couple of weeks I was playing an elaborate joke because surely I wasn't really getting married. Most of my roommates knew I was serious. My best friend was sure I'd gone off the deep end.
I was one hundred percent at peace with my decision to marry Kent. If I had any doubts, was nervous even, felt any negative feelings in the least, I could not have married him.
I dated a man on and off for five years before Kent. Whenever marriage came up, I was a wreck, an absolutely wreck. It felt wrong, it was a relief to put it on the back burner. With Kent, complete opposite. I was so at peace. I knew it was right. Kent did too, although Kent did have a major panic attack the day after he proposed, poor guy.
We had a very short six week engagement and married exactly three months after we met. So much joy, so much happiness in holding the hand of my sweetheart while making promises to God and to each other.
And to think, it all started with a blind date.
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