Ean's Thinking Outside the Box

Or rather,

Any excuse to use our new found knowledge on how to work a car jack.  Because you know, tires don't blow and shred nearly often enough to work such a cool tool!

Even though Ean has a lot of his dad's quality, he does something his dad would never dream of, Ean likes to rearrange his furniture.   I have a theory on this, I think it's a deep seated desire to have an excuse to inventory every belonging in his room.  Which is easier when all the dresser and desks drawers are emptied on the bed because you're moving stuff.

Of course, Ean is only seven so moving stuff has it's drawbacks, like you have to drag stuff across the carpet if you're to impatient to wait until your mom can help you.

Ean's work desk is rather old and I am not sure if it's pieced together from these oddball end table things we have or if these little end tables are pieces of other desks.  Either way, it's not very sturdy and in his enthusiasm, Ean managed to break the legs.

Can you see where this is going, obviously it'd be easier to fix the desk, if the desk was suspended up in the air.  I mean, logically, this is the next step.

And a single desk obviously needs to be really secure and it could be dangerous so *actual events* lets "borrow" mom's keys, get the jack from the suburban so we can lift the desk.  This could be dangerous, so lets make sure we have the eight foot rod meant to be used so you're not actually climbing under the vehicle.

This is really innovative thinking on his part, if this baby became unstable, we wouldn't want any red headed boys to be harmed.

Then he put a little more thought and decided that he needed two jacks.  What better way to stabilize the damaged desk then to use two jacks, one on each end.  Actually when you consider it all, that's pretty bright thinking for a seven year old.

Of course his daddy caught him and while congratulating him on really thinking this out, he broke the news to him that jacks weren't to be used on furniture, because if we did that, then there's no guarantee they'd be in the car when needed. 

His daddy also let him know that he could fix his desk, even without a jack, although it would take a few days to get to it.

It amazes me how a child that can string all these ideas together, showing really innovative thinking, still misses the mark on his personal communications with his fellow man, so much so that he thoroughly manages to tick people off.

Including his mother.

He's very quick to declare how wrong you are, how you forgot and is uber quick to cast judgment in saying you lied to him over the simplest of misunderstandings.  No wonder the guy has such a hard time with friendships.

So we're working on this.  Slowly but hopefully surely.   He's such a good guy and now that it's not non-stop destruction, he's actually fun and entertaining, he'd be just about perfect if we can get this social stuff figured out. 

And of course, figure out reasons to use the car jack again.

Oddball Day

I feel like I accomplished very little today and yet, I had to run all over the place.  Thankfully most days aren't like this! 

Okay, I probably didn't run "that" much, it just felt like a lot because I only slept about five hours last night.  I know, the big question, why in the world did I not sleep more?   I mean, I have had children sleeping all through the night for over two years now.

The lack of sleep was that autumn nightmare that I call, allergy season.

I simply can't sleep when my nose and sinuses are congested and boy were they last night.  My cheeks ached from all the congestion.  Not a pretty picture nor a restful night!

So my sleep deprived self took the four youngest to school.  Pretty much the kids get a ride whenever it's the twins school day because they walk so slowly, everyone would miss breakfast if I didn't take them.  I really can't see getting the kids ready any earlier either, it's hard enough as it is and last night everything was laid out for them!

I so wanted to take a nap but I had other stuff I have been putting off.  So off I went to Jane's school with a copy of Jane's diagnosis.  I had the secretary copy and put it in her file.  Anything to help her teachers understand her better.

Then there was laundry to switch.

Lunch to eat.

Boys to pick up.

Tried to figure out why David didn't share his show and tell.  Left his teacher confused because Greg got his and it looked I'd sent only one son with a show and tell.  David finally spit out that he just didn't want share his show and tell.  I think he missed what the teacher was saying. 

Message to leave at the office.  You see, this weekend Ean expressed how much everyone teases him at school.  Now, I am sure there are confrontations but for an incredibly bright boy, Ean just doesn't put it together that his need to tease goads people into not liking him and "being mean."  It's really a challenge for Ean socially.  So I had his teacher call and talked to her.

The good news, Ean is really doing well in class.  He's occasionally distracted but overall he pays attention and does his work.  His teacher said she'd talk to the other second grade teachers so they could keep a better eye on him.

After that there was, homework to organize.  Then we had Jane's appointment and Jane hadn't really done her homework for counseling. 

We did get a bonus in counseling, they're adjusting Jane's goals and adding social skills into her curriculum.  I am really excited about this. She's come so far but she is still pretty clueless on both reading other people and self monitoring herself in conversations.  It's made for some potentially awkward moments, but Jane plows forward completely oblivious to any faux pas she's committed and utterly confused by the reactions of those around her.

Then the rush of dinner after a quick trip to Costco.

See, I really didn't do that much but man it seemed like I never stopped moving or calling people.  It probably felt like more because I was so useless this weekend with allergies. 

Unleavened Bread

Or rather unleavened breakfast cake.

Kent's most favorite food in the world is a baked good called "breakfast cake".  It's really a whole wheat coffee cake that his mom made for special occasions when he was a child.  My version of the original recipe is quite a bit tweaked but the result is a lighter, fluffier breakfast cake that Kent loves even more.

Jane's tried a number of times to make breakfast cake and she's done "okay" but it's never as good as I make it.  So she keeps trying.  Actually it would be more accurate to say that her dad keeps assigning her the job of making it.  She will figure out the finer points of baking, eventually.  Her skills didn't help today when she forgot the baking soda.

She blames her dad, see Kent was getting the ingredients out and putting them on the table.  Jane was measuring, dumping and stirring.  Kent didn't get out the baking soda, so Jane never put it in.

The resulting food, and I am using the term "food" really loosely here was more liked a really bad baked pudding.  If the breakfast cake didn't have so much butter in it, it would have been inedible.  Kinda like the pizza crust that was in the microwave to long.

Kent's making himself an egg sandwich for dinner right now.

I have to honestly say that I can relate.  When I was, probably about Jane's age, I attempted to bake a cake from scratch, with the help of my little brother.

That cake was amazing.  It was frisbee like in shape and density.  I could balance it on my finger, dead center and it didn't break or fall to pieces.  It had to be cut with steak knives.

It was a day I never forgot and I never ever made that mistake again.  So I'm hopeful that my dear girl learns from this.

Kent's planning on having her make another one next Sunday.

Apparently this one didn't cure his cravings.

The UnPlanned

Obviously not everything turns out perfectly and accidents happen.  Today was a perfect day marred by the unexpected and it was interesting to note the different reactions from each of our children.

To start at the beginning, Kent's been wearing his cowboy boots to work.  See, without a steady paycheck for the four months before he started his new job, buying decent dress shoes wasn't high on his list.  Aching feet however pushed the need for new shoes to the forefront and Kent decided he'd better invest in something that would be kind to his feet.  The ever expensive "Sass" shoes.

Yes if you have foot problems, the hype is 100% true, they are wonderful but not something we've ever purchases before.  We're such "make do" type of people.

The store to buy Sass shoes is in Idaho Falls.  Not to far away, only about forty minutes from our house but still, it would take up the afternoon.  So Kent decided he wanted to make a day of it.  Bring the kids, invite my mom, bring a picnic lunch, go to the Idaho Falls Temple visitor center, buy Sass shoes and finish it all off with the Holy Grail of outdoors men, the army surplus store.

With the exception of the five year old that avoids pooping if you don't remind him, and he starts "leaking" (the clean-up included tossing the undies and having the child spend the rest of the day "commando" ) everything listed above went pretty smoothly.

Although we did almost have a meltdown with a bunch of boys, the ringleader being the tallest, seven year old red head that fell in love with this crappy $20.00 plastic gun.  Oh boy did the boys covet those guns.  They were everything little boy dreams are made of and they looked like maybe they might even last all the way home before breaking.  They stayed at the store much to Ean's utter disappointment.

Then the trip home.  We knew something was wrong on the way up.  Kent was unable to go 75 without the suburban shaking.  Kent even had me stick my head out the window to see if I could perceive either tire on the passenger side shaking.  I couldn't tell, with the car vibrating, how was I suppose to tell between me shaking or the tire shaking?

So going home Kent was going slow, maybe 60 in a 75 zone.

Just before Blackfoot the driver's side back tire blew.  Loud noise, a slight loss of control as we jerked towed the fast lane, which was thankfully empty.  Kent was able to quickly get control, pull over and break quickly.  For a busy day, there amazingly wasn't any vehicles near us, either in front or back or in the other Lane.

Kate was almost in hysterics.  Talk about panic.  We had to talk her down and repeatedly remind her that YES if was scary BUT look no one is hurt.


Jane was antsy to get out and see but my mom chewed her out (took three chewing outs before she stayed in the car.)

We were on the right side of row, on a highway with a speed limit of 75 and there were tons of semi's and campers driving southbound.  What Jane had trouble understanding was that even though she had sense to stay well away from traffic, if she was out her brothers would pile out and that would be far to dangerous.

Speaking of dangerous, the kids were all chewed out by my mom for wiggling as Kent was jacking up the car.

Hot and dusty, Kent got the tire changed.  I did not like seeing cars zipping past just three feet from husband as he was laying on the road trying to jack up the car.

With all things, it could have been worse.  Just a few weeks ago we were in Yellowstone and can you imagine what a disaster if that tire had blown with the trailer attached?

I had a few drinks left over from lunch, which I let the kids take turns sipping, mostly to give them something to do.  I kept one drink aside for the man doing all the physical labor in the heat.

The spare was low on air but Kent figured he'd make it just fine and we went a bit slower then normal although Kent was regretting his decision when we stopped for air in Pocatello and the smell of hot, smoky rubber hit us.

We went straight home and Kent doused the tire with water to cool everything off, and then he noticed the smoking rubber was really from the tread of the blown tire that had wrapped itself around the axle.  Kent doesn't know how he missed that and we all said a prayer of thanks for getting home safely.

It was while removing the tread from the axle that Ean learned how to work a jack.  Something every seven year old should learn!

So more eventful then we wanted but thankfully not worst.   The only wound we have, is from the cash we need to dip into savings in order to get new tires.

They Are Killing Me!

So the conversation I overheard on the couch the other day went something like this....

David "Mom MOM, Greg's heart is NOT BEATING"

Greg "It's not beating?!"

David "No it's NOT BEATING!"

Me "Yes Dave, it's beating"

David "Oh yeah, it IS beating, You're ALIVE GREG!"

I almost peed from snickering so hard.  We waited so long for those conversations and now they are really pulling gems.  I especially love hearing Greg, who still has a pretty obvious language delay, when he can really articulate his thoughts and feelings.

I get warm fuzzies.


Then there's instances like when I caught David getting into stuff in the pantry, Called him on it and he just backed out of the room, wide eyed, turned and at a dead run and went out the back door.

So busted.

The kid giggles takes the edge off of real life, especially when stuff is uncertain.  We're not worried or stressed but there's a possibility of another job change in the future for my dear hubs.  We waited so long for an opportunity like the one he has now and while any concrete changes wouldn't happen until the first of next year, there is a question mark in the future due to a previous employee choosing to come back and company policy allowing him to do so.

Meaning that if Kent's pregnant coworker comes back after maternity leave and there is four people in the office, one person will be laid off.   There's not enough business to support four loan officers at this office.

Now unlike the cellular business, which often felt like a time bomb that could go off at any moment, this little possible glitch doesn't have me worried.   I have a very strong feeling that it will all be fine.  I just don't know how exactly all the factors will play out.

See, the pregnant coworker's husband is going after a job with a pay increase and she's expressed that if he got that job, she'd stay home.   Ironically it's the sort of job that Kent would LOVE and he's thinking of pursuing it.

I don't know what to pray for.  I don't know what would be best for our family.   So my decision, sit back and pray for our well being, see what happens and have faith.

Oh and laugh frequently at my children's antics.

No Call from the Doctor's Office

It's been a couple of weeks since Jane's diagnosis was mailed out to us, so I found it rather puzzling that I hadn't heard from the doctor's office yet.  So I took the initiative and called explaining that I hadn't heard back.  Only an hour later Jane's doctor called (and he was out delivering a baby when I called!) and said that he hadn't noted any requests for medication so that's why he hadn't called.

I let him know that in my conversation with the psychologist, it was indicated that I needed to discuss with him what would be best for Jane.  The doctor asked if there was anything being done for Jane and filled him in Jane's therapy to help her deal with anxiety.  I also let him know that I want to try some ADHD meds and see if that helps her. 

As her mom, I need to know we've done everything we can and if it doesn't help, there's no "what if" hanging out there.  We'll have helped Jane in every possible manner whether the meds help her or not.

So I made an appointment for next week and we'll see what we try and if it helps or not. 

All this experience with the psychologist and working with Jane has me considering seeing if I could get a referral for Kate.  The poor girl has such anger issues and then there's the compulsive food stealing and eating issues.  We've worked and worked and worked with her but our efforts as parents seem to making only minimal progress.  This isn't life or death and Kate's birthday is coming up in December, I figure next physical I'll bring it up and see about getting a referral. 

The doctor fun continues.  Ean has an orthodontic consult tomorrow morning.  Boy it's worked out well.  I got an 8:00am appointment, meaning Ean will only miss a half hour of school.  Kent would really like to hold off and wait and see what his teeth do but it's my understanding if a kid needs braces, an earlier intervention can really cut down on the work needed.

I also mentioned that I personally would like to hear from the person that is the expert on teeth.

Speaking of teeth, finally, finally, after two and a half years, I'll get my bridge done.  I've had this gap for three summers and I'm so ready to be done.  Finances have always been the reason I've held off but no more.  You see the new dental insurance will cover 50% of the cost and we're not sure we'll have that dental coverage in six months.  So just to be sure and take advantage, we're biting the financial bullet and taking on the cost of this dental work.

The very back molar has a crack in it so I'd need work anyway.  If I'm paying for a crown, I might as well pay for the bridge, since this is an anchor tooth for that bridge.  It needs to be done while the tooth is still healthy too.  So there we go.  The Hill Health Report.  Whew!

Perfection is Relative

My idea of perfection is entirely my own and if I were to describe my perfect morning, there will be plenty that roll their eyes and wonder what my problem was.  Why didn't I shoot higher or lower.

Or if my dad were alive, why didn't my perfect day involve a quality dark ale? 

Since I don't drink, I'll have to try embrace other ideals and toss dad's out.  No offense to Dad of course but mood altering beverages just aren't on my list.  Although it was suggested to me yesterday as I was falling apart that perhaps I was in need of a caffeinated beverage.  Thank you Kent. 

Actually, my own idea of perfection may vary from day to day.  That said, it was an incredible morning and I felt complete and whole in a way that I seldom have time to stop and enjoy. 

I really dislike alternating day kindergarten but this morning, since David spent last night at my mom's I woke up this morning with three children going out the door and just one at home.  My ever affectionate, also known as; Velcro BOY!

Yes, quality time with my Greg.

So we shared a package organic pop tarts (yes I realize "organic" and "pop tarts" are an oxymoron. lol )  We watched a movie snuggled under a quilt that my mom made years ago and drank herbal tea together.  It was very fun and my goodness, I don't know how much longer that boy will be willing to snuggle so I really sat back and enjoyed the time together.

I also snacked on ears and the juicy, squiggle side of that boy.  There were giggles.  A lot of giggles. 

Dave will be home soon, so the one on one time is almost over but in our family especially, these one on one moments are incredibly precious.  Especially for Greg whom I believe has a deep seated desire to be an only child.

It's Not Suppose to Make Me Sad

But it does.

My absolutely stunning cousin recently was married and of course being separated from everyone, living across the country, my only glimpse is the album she posted on facebook. 

I made my choices on where to live long ago and I know it's right.  After all, living with my sweetheart, no matter what the distance from the family I knew growing up, could never be wrong.  Really it's not the distance, or seeing cousins and even my brother at the festivities that tore a hole in my heart in this morning.

It was one particular picture.  A joyful, lovely picture of the bride's father dancing with his sister and yet another reminder that my dad isn't here.

I'm always aware of what he's missed with my immediate family.  Watching my children especially and not being able to share in the hundreds of little things they do every day is hard enough but it hit me on how much more he's missed.

Family has always been important to my dad and not only has he missed his own grandchildren but he's missed his siblings becoming grandparents themselves.  He would have loved that.  What a loss.

So the picture of his brother and sister dancing has left me feeling a little lost this am because I know my dad would have loved to have been there.  He would have insisted on a dance with the bride, reminisced at years gone by, told jokes to all that listened and he would partied like only a Rush can.

That's not all that has me feeling off.  It's like with dad not there, I feel like my connection to the cousins I enjoyed so much growing up is slipping away.  I don't want that.  At the same time, there's nothing I can do. 

Just as we continue on, so does everyone else.

Camping in YellowStone

Yellowstone is simply one of our favorite outings.  Last year we tried our hand at camping in Yellowstone and it was a complete success, so we went again this year.

Unfortunately we had children in school so we couldn't leave incredibly early, but a few were retrieved (or "freed" as Jane's teacher put it") early so we could leave by 3:00pm.  Not to bad, we arrived at the park by 6:00pm, and a mere hour later, we were checked in.

Just for the record, plan on the checking in process to be incredibly long, especially in the evening when there's a line.  If you're driving an RV or pulling a camper, make sure you have reservations because spots are limited and it sucks to get turned away and face another two plus hours of driving.

That didn't happen to us, but last year we saw a camper turned away to try other campsites in the park and this was after dark.  It was a sad sad sight.

So, we checked in, roasted hot dogs and went to the amphitheater for a fascinating program on the great earthquake of  1959.  Even the little boys were mildly interested, especially with pictures being flashed of new lakes that were formed, downed roads and trees, lots of interesting information. 

Ean had stayed home from school Friday with a wicked cough (sorry, channeling Vermont speak).   So while Kent and I packed, Ean had a full day to basically do two chores, grab his coat and a jacket to put in the camp trailer for the camp out.  He failed to do both, so being *M*O*M*, I wrapped him in my sweater and was fairly uncomfortable with no covering.  Kent offered me his jacket but I couldn't let him be cold either.  Our children have no idea how much we give up for them.

It was only mildly uncomfortable so I survived, luckily the temperatures hadn't dropped yet, so while chilly at night and in the am, it wasn't freezing. 

If we had gone a few weeks later, Ean would have been miserable.

The biggest problem camping and hiking a national park with eight children (we went with another family) is that we had to repeat information dozens and I do mean DOZENS of times.  Mostly "Stay on the path"  and all the many reasons why you'd stay on the path in a thermally active area.  It only took the first six hours before most of the older children started to believe us. 

We saw lots of geysers of all sizes.  We saw small geysers that erupted every 30 seconds or so for small bursts of bubbly foot high columns of water.  We saw simmering pools reflecting colors usually reserved for gems.  Cauldrons of  orange witches brew with softball size bubbles in a steady stream.  Steam, so much steam that one child quipped after a very long Saturday of lots of sites "We can make steam at HOME!"

Overall, I'd say the trip was a success although I need to work on my children skills with button pushing children because I was not in the mood most of the trip.  

Next year, we'll camp in a different part of the park.  Already looking forward to it.

Wait, What?

The job of parent is tough under the absolute best of circumstances.  Of course parenting never ever happens under the best of circumstances.  Somehow Murphy's  Law comes into play and whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.

It doesn't help when you have children that actively test you at every turn, keeping your wits sharp and your nerves frayed.

Case in point, yesterday at about 10:00 am I received a call from a child.  I hadn't looked at the caller ID, so I didn't know what school the call was from.  The twins had Kindergarten so there were five possible children this call could be from however the twins were quickly eliminated because with their language delays.  This call was from a child that had a bigger vocabulary then either of the twins.

I also surmised that it couldn't be Jane.  As random as Jane is in conversations, this was even more random plus the child on the phone wasn't doing the "Mooooooom" that Jane usually does when I don't immediately understand the meaning of what she's telling me.

That left either Ean or Kate.  Both tend to speak extremely quiet when explaining things to either parent.  I don't know why.  They can yell like crazy when either feels a sibling has wronged them, but try to have a conversation and they are two clicks above a whisper.  Annoying pretty much anywhere but especially difficult when they are either in the third row of the suburban or when they're on the phone.

This child was on the phone and it took me a few minutes to figure out it was Kate.  It took even longer to figure out what the phone call was about.  It went something like this.

Kate "I can't find my math book"

Me "Did you leave it at home?"

Kate "No I brought it to school and left it in my desk."

Me "And it's not in your desk?"

Kate "I looked in my desk and it's GONE."

Me "Kate, if it isn't at home, I can't help you."

Kate "But I can't find my math book."

Me "So it isn't at home."

Kate "No, I brought it to school and put it in my desk but now it's not there."

Me "Kate honey, if it's not at home, there's not anything I can do to help."

Kate "But mom, I can't find my math book."

Seriously, this went on for at least five more rounds with only slight variations of the general pattern given.  It was maddening.

So after speaking to her teacher after school we established that Kate had taken her book home on Thursday, did her work and brought it back Friday.  She didn't take it again from School because I checked backpacks on Friday before our Yellowstone trip to make sure anyone with homework brought it on the trip and that particular girl's backpack was empty.

So somewhere, someone took Kate's book.  The fifth graders do switch rooms for math, so two other students sit at Kate's desk for sometime during the day.  Most important, Kate wasn't at fault.  Kate's teacher mentioned that maybe Kate shouldn't fall to pieces quite so fast.  That's a struggle for Kate, but she's working on it.

So that was Monday.  My entire day revolved around that one phone call and one missing math book.  And we're not even three full weeks into school yet.

First Official Day of Kindergarten!!

Milestones can be bittersweet.

Or, they can be a sweet sign of freedom, lol!

So my preemies had their first day of Kindergarten today and I've had a lot of people ask me how I was holding up. If I was ready to let them go. My answer has been, oh heck yeah!

I think I'd feel more bittersweet about my babies growing up if it hadn't been so hard when they were infants and toddlers. I mean, we have three boys 19 months apart. Do you realize that means for the first five months of the twins life we had three, yes THREE babies under two.

It was insane.

The first three years are mostly a blur. The first year there was lots of nursing, vomiting (projectile vomiting is pretty common for preemies.), laundry and trying to keep Ean from destroying anything and everything. I am not exaggerating. I've often joked that Ean was sent to us by the Lord to keep us humble by shedding us of our worldly possessions.

Boy was he good at it too! The destruction list is extensive but includes phones, keyboards, a VCR, more food then I could even start to list usually dumped in the kitchen, VCR tapes that were made into purses and handbags, yarn, crafts, SHEETS, the vanity in the downstairs bathroom (it's coated with so much nail polish you can't even see the color of the sink). This is just what I can name off the top of my head.

Add the appointments for the twins. The complications of that pregnancy added numerous potential birth defects. We had them tracked from birth on to catch any problems.

We were blessed and everything we've dealt with has been minor. Sure they've both had a year of physical therapy (walking at 20 months and 22 months) continuous language delays and help with all that via both the early learning program and the Head Start program. They've come a long way and I'm so proud of everything they've accomplished.

It has been a long journey and frankly I'm exhausted, physically and emotionally.

So showing them the kindergarten door, getting hugs and kisses, and then soaking in their excitement for a few minutes, utterly sweet.

Now matter how sweet, I find myself thinking, "wow, we actually survived."

So here's to continual survival and more milestones of course, as our miracle babies continue to conquer the world!